What do you call a fly with no wings? Disabled

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Two men and a woman go to lunch together at a restaurant in New York City. The first man says, "I'm glad that we're finally doing this." The second man says, "Yeah, me too." The woman concurs.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? It's the nazis we have reason to suspect that you are harboring illegal jewish fugitives and would like to check your house if it isn't too much trouble on your part.

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What have you got there? Hitler's gas bill... Oh.. don't show him that, he'll be furious Whys that? He can't read.

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Why did Mary fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Mary.

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Once there was a ugly barnacle. He was so ugly, everyone died. The end

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A dog with toothpaste in it's mouth wanders into a bar. The bartender beats it to death, because he thought it had rabies.

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Roses are red, My name is Dave, This poem makes no sense, Microwave.

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My mind is like full of holes so I cannot remember where I am anymore, and I am tired in addition, but say, what the hell is a tussle? Sounds cute, but what is that?

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So this guy filled with blood, right? This caused his veins to protrude and him to bleed strongly when he cut his wrists with razors later that night- because of his struggle with depression and substance abuse.

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KNOCK KNOCK whos there Malcom i dont know any Malcom go away!

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a clown, and clowns are scary.

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A guy walks into a bar and falls.

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Whats worse than a mother of 3 children, jumping off a bridge, smashing into the metal roof of a large car and dieing on impact? A mother of 3 children jumping off a bridge, smashes into the metal roof of a large car, survives,, becomes paralyzed, and has to explain to her children, why she is in a wheel chair for the rest of her life.

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A kid goes to the doctor and says, "Doctor! it hurts when I do this!" The Doctor says, "Well, because you have been diagnosed with ALD, and to make matters worse you are allergic to rapeseed oil" The child then cries because he will never live past 40 years old

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What worse than a baby nailed to a tree? One baby nailed to ten trees.

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How many pancakes can you fit into a gopher hole? Red - because ice cream doesn't have any bones.

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Hey i just met you, and this is crazy, i have amnesia, i'm Skepta

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A pair of brothers walked into a bar. It was where the wake was being held from their mother's funeral.

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If life's a box of chocolates, I'm the dominant male.

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What did the frat guy drink after he lifted? A various assortment of beverages that were chilled at a cool 66 degrees.

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MRLSIXBWBSOVODKSHAIFKQJXIGJNRMWKSJDIVIVKEBWBEBKGKBODJWBEBJRRKFOBPBPDJWVECTNYLLNNIFUDJEBWKSOXOVOFJSBSBDKCKFKTKEBEJDLDOFIDKDJDHDBENSMSKSKSKSKSJDJDJSNRNTNTKDPQPWJSHCHCJDNEBBSJSKC

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Your mother is so fat that when she jumps into a pool, she displaces a proportionately larger amount of water than people with normal body mass indexes or BMI

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what do 9 out of 10 people enjoy?............Gangrape

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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