whats the difference between a boyscout and a jew? boyscouts come home from camp

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Why did Chuck Norris start crying? Because he was in a coma

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Guess what my dad got me for my birthday? NOTHING, he left my mom and I when I was a baby.

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Q: Why couldn't the man lick his ice cream? A: Because his body shut down due to the fact that a bullet went straight through his brain. This happened before he could even order his ice cream.

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How did the the the police know Princess Diana had dandruff? They found her head & shoulders in the glove compartment.

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What do you call an old lady walking down the street? Widowed.

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Feel free to call me, forget the money, as for my fucking eye, I just sure as hell hope those responsible are rotting in prison. I mean I just lost an eye right? Just kidding, I am the one who has been dead wrong here, I judged you wrong, I am the fuck that seems to feel responsible for the actions of others at times, then again I thought that you where sending them against me, they surely claimed they where, but fuck, people use all sorts of things and people as an excuse to do whatever the hell they want.

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Q: How many hair styles do celebreties induce annualy? A: I have no clue but I'm pretty sure that's a midget defacing your house!

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What did the blind boy get for one of his Christmas present? A cinema ticket.

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Q: What was the pirate movie rated? A: PG-13 actually because, despite the potentially graphic nature of the previews, the creators scaled down mature content so that it could reach a wider audience.

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so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane act

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A black man and a white man enter a public toilet. They both begin to pee at the urinals. The whiteman peers over to the blackman mid-pee. He is dissappointed to find that the black man's penis is not large according to stereotype and then blushes embarassed by his own latent homosexuality. They both leave the toilet and never see eachother again. The white man cries himself to sleep later that night. 'I've been hiding too long' he thinks.

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What did the little boy want to be when he grew up? A cone

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What do accountants do when they're constipated? Take a laxative and eat plenty of fiber.

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How do you hack into someone's computer? A few good hits with a hatchet should do the trick

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock. Who's there? The chicken.

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I'm Donald Trump! Wump wump wump! What's good for the goose Is good for the gander I'm Donald Trump!

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How do you turn a dishwasher into a snowblower? Give her a shovel

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I can't believe they been together for 16 years!! Who? Deez Nutz!

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What do you call a chicken who eats chicken. Cannibal

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What do you call a black hitch hiker: stranded

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what did the blond say to his mother?? Nothing. He is deaf and has to use sign language.

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What do u get when you mix a young asian woman and a black man? Tiger Woods

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What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? Neil Armstrong WALKS on the moon. Michael Jackson rapes little boys

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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