What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is an Italian pastry with tomato sauce, cheese and other toppings and the other is a human being.

american idol

Roses are red, Violets are glorious, Don't try to surprise Oscar Pistorius.

What's worse than a bug in your soup? Getting shot in the stomach.

so a man walks into a bar...... He has a couple laughs over some drinks then went home.

Jane was playing in the back of the bus with an eyeball...up and down,up and down.An old woman asks her : Jane,what are you doing?She responds : I`m trying to see who`s the driver

Why doesn't the man like iced tea? Because he likes it hot.

So an African, Asian, and White man walk into a bar, what do they all have in common? Believe it or not, they all liked cantaloupe.

What did the Dark Knight say to the Policeman? I'm Batman

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm bad at poems... Nice tits

A man is sleeping and is woken up. What does he say? Why did you wake me up

There was a little boy and a little girl in a bathtub having a bath. Suddenly the little girl looked down at the boy. "Can I touch it?" "No way -- you already broke yours off!"

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Tulips are white and Pansies are pink.

yo mamma's so fat she's fat!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

A man once went duck pin bowling, 5 years later he died of leukemia.

I went to school. Then I came home.

whats purple and not a rapist barney, I lied about the rapist part

What's a foot long and slippery? A slipper.

A Jew, a black man and a Christian enter a bar. Black people werent allowed in at the time so he was escorted out. The Jew And Christian have a blast and the time of their lives that night.

Kid A:We're home alone, you know what that means. Kid B:Cover ourselves in vaseline and slide around like slugs on the kitchen floor? Kid A:Yes

WHY DONT WE HAVE BOTH?

Person 1 Hey man what's up Person 2 nothing much I just impregnated your mom

What do you call someone that blows up a plane? Nothing you were on that plane

What do you get when you cross a badger and a paper bag? The badger is cross of course but the bag is inanimate and can't be angered.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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