What's black an blue and doesn't like sex? The 8year old in my trunk.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What did Yoda say to Darth Vader? The only time the two had talked Darth Vader was still Anakin therefor, he said nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What's Green And Has Wheels? Grass, I Was Just Kidding About The Wheels.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

yo mama's so fat, yo mama's so ugly; your mothers breasts sag with such severity that the late great surrealist artist Salvador Dali mistook them for clocks

thumb_up thumb_down +11

I have a dirty joke. Poop.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

My friend on xbox told me about this cool clan. I went to join but I didn't like to wear the white robes

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Two Mexicans are at the border and want to cross it. How do they cross it? Illegally

thumb_up thumb_down +11

A man walks into a bar. He gets drunk, goes home, and beats his wife and kids.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

If life gives you melons. You may be dyslexic.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

How does a black guy in debt make money fast at the bank? He applies for a loan and conscientiously works hard to pay off the loan in turn, which he was lucky enough to get at a low interest rate.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Lollies are sweet warheads are sour, open your legs and feel my power

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Im about to rewrite History....... History

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What is worse than torture? Not much.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

A man dreamt that he was eating a marshmallow. He ate his dog.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

A man walks into a bar later at night & the bartender says how was your day the man replies "well I found out my mom is a raging crack addict, my grampa has alzheimer's & i have terminal cancer" how was yours the bartender says "I found out im Hitlers lost son".

thumb_up thumb_down +11

what's worse than both your parents dying? finding out that they were hundreds of thousands of dollars in debt and they left you nothing, including the house, oh and you have to be out by the end of the week, the bank is ready to re-possess the house, especially since your parents haven't paid the mortgage for 8 months. oh, by the way, happy birthday! written by KA

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What's purple, blue, red, orange, yellow and green. A rainbow .

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Two men are fighting in a boxing match. One gets punched in the crouch, cries, and goes home to watch "The Simpsons".

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What did one bulbasaur say to one squirtle? Well, first off, pokemon are virtual animals created solely for the enjoyment of entertaining japanese children and causing seizure episodes. This fictional creation then migrated to an american tv market, still maintaining their superficial existence while continuing to promote slavery and the use of round balls that capture your problems and propagate winning through random ball throwing. They are fake, and as they are fake, the bulbasaur said "we are fake"

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What is worse than waking up by your alarm clock on the weekend? 9/11

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What one thing do the five members of Mystery Inc have in common? They were all raped and killed by REAL MONSTERS! One of the monsters happened to be Chuck Norris. He's a BEAST!

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did Timmy mow the lawn? He didn't particularly like the way it looked Why did Timmy fall down the well? He is retarded and thirsty How did Timmy die? He had stage three lung cancer Why cant Timmy drive a car? He has been dead for three years

thumb_up thumb_down +9

A man walks into a bar. Three hours later, ambulances arrived, because the man was knocked out. The man who saved was known as a hero, and was awarded a medal for his good deed.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What do you call a horse with a missing leg Calling it names could be considered animal abuse and should be reported immediately

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops