How do you know when an elephant is in your refrigerator Theres printson the cheese cakes

They usually say "fuck" the police! But no one wants to fuck the police...

why did suzie fall of the swings? because she had no arms.

What do you call a person trying to rob a store with no arms? Peter Pan

how do u make a snooker table laugh? TICKLE ITS BALLS HAHA

Why did the audience walk out of the movie? Because it had just finished.

WARNING: this is a black joke Why does everybody hate darth vader? he is all black

Two blondes walks into a tavern, which is kind of funny, since the second one should have seen it.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? To get to the other side!

Why did the chicken cross the road? To suck my dick

What do you call a black man that is wearing a suit? Whatever his name happens to be

Why did the little boy throw rocks at his sister? ...Because she has cancer.

What is the fastest bird in air? NONE WHO NEEDS TO RIDE BIRDS WHEN YOU HAVE AIROPLANES!!!!

A man walked into a bar. He needed 5 stitches.

what happens if you drop a spoon? it sounds a lot, and it's annoying

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

How many gun shots does it take to kill you? 1..2... 3...4... Samantha reapeatedly kept shooting her enemy until she noticed that her enemy was Chuck Norris. So how many gunshots does it take to kill Chuck Norris? The world may never know.

What is the Question to Life, the Universe, and Everything? 43 - 1 = ?

Knock Knock. Who's there? Cow that recognizes normal social cues and politely waits for its turn to speak. Cow that recognizes normal social cues and politely waits for its turn to speak who? Moo.

So this blond chick walks into a bar, and orders a drink.

Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? no... Well, It's really nice. :)

A Muslim walks into a bar He immediatley turns around and leaves as his religious beliefs forbid consumption of alcoholic beverages.

You're an Irish male that walks into a bar full of Mexicans. Upon entering you are approached by two topless women. ....You realize you have been coming to the same sleazy strip club on the edge of town every night after work for the past few years. After seeing that you have gradually become completely bald and neglect your two children and wife, you recognize your extreme depression. Strippers now see you as a consistent, "paying customer" and you proceed seek psychiatric care, while being prescribed anti-depressants. The Mexicans at the bar are hard working, tax-paying citizens that would like to provide an education for their children.

i bought a knock-knock joke book, and was unamused.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...