Mary had a little lamb, But it couldn't stop her from being raped.

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Why did the woman scream when she saw the mouse? Because she's afraid of technology.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was simply wandering around and happened to walk from one side of the road to the other.

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What did the deaf girl get for Christmas? Nothing, she was Jewish

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What's the worst part of being a black Jew? That is a very uncommon combination of race and religion, therefore causing obvious confusion.

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Why was the woman in the kitchen? Because she is enjoying the meal her husband has prepared for her after a long day at her second full-time job of the day

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What do you do if you are locked inside a car with a baseball bat? Unlock the car

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Knock Knock. Who's There? I don't know. I'm paralyzed.

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Hamsters are a lot like cigarettes. They're completely harmless until you put one in your mouth and light it on fire.

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Why did the dinosaur rent a DVD in Redbox about a sex? Because he didn't own a Blu-Ray player.

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The boy gets shot in the face, he then dies of childhood obesity.

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pull my finger (farts)

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why was 9 afraid of 6 ? because it made her pregnant

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what is the difference between a jew and a boy scout? a boy scout comes home from camp

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What did one ocean say to the other? Nothing, oceans don't have hands to wave either

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Man 1: Do you want to hear a joke? Man 2: Sure. Man 1: Okay.

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What's the difference between you and a bucket full of shit? The bucket...

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who gives a crap?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because no cars were coming.

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What's worst then finding an worm in your apple. Finding a colony of flesh eating bugs after you toke a bite.

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What happens when you throw a red rock into a blue ocean. The rock gets wet.

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What did one lawyer say to the other? We are both lawyers. What did the stupid lawyer say to the other lawyer? We are both pineapples.

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An Jewish man worked at a bank, and ate chicken noodles for lunch and then stabbed and man playing the saxophone.

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(Mortal Kombat Annihilation) Princess Kitana: "Mother, you're alive" Sindel: "Too bad you, will die" (Troll 2) "They're eating her. And then they're gonna me. Oh my gawwwwwwwwd." (The Room) Johnny: I did not hit her, it's not true! It's bullshitt! I did not hit her! [throws water bottle] Johnny: I did *not*. Oh hi, Mark. Mark: Oh, hey Johnny, what's up?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops