Man 1: my wife has lovley perfume. She smells like a peppermint cream. Man 2: Yeah, I know, I spent eight hours shagging her last night.

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why did the little boy fall down?? Because a terrorist shot him

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roses are red violets are blue i have Alzheimers but at least i do not have Alzheimers

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yo mama so fat she died from a heart attack

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Whats the difference between Justin Bieber and Elton John? They're both gay.

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Knock knock. Whos there Time to get a watch

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Did you hear about that anthony weiner guy. He is very depressed, and your mother has cancer.

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What does a duck have in common? The further it flies the more.

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How do you make a person who wins the lottery sad? You threaten to kill his family.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm drunk, I want Taco Bell.

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What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A pharmacist.

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what do you do when life gives you lemons? take them, free shit is cool!

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A man walks into himself. He is revealed.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends how hard you throw 'em.

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There is a law in california that says that women are not allowed to drive with house coats.

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What do you call a horse standing alone in an empty field? Tesco's own Beef Lasagne.

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What's brown and rhymes with snoop ? Dr Dre.

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Three men on a journey stop at a farm and ask the farmer if they might be allowed to stay the night. The farmer consents upon one condition: that the visitors not lay a hand on his daughter. The men respected the farmers wishes and left in the morning.

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Q:What happens when you choke a smurf? A: Nothing because smurfs dont exist

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''Hey, this is absolutely true. There's an organization now called 'Draft Dick Cheney for President, 2012.' Yeah. Good luck with that. They tried to draft Dick Cheney five times during Vietnam. That didn't work.

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bar man a walks a into...DYSLEXIA IS NOT FUNNY.

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Neo Nero, why did you not tell me that Nero7 is dead? When was the funeral held? Where is he buried? At point Zero? Please I need to know, he was basically my father, or rather all that my father never was, at least I dont have to wonder if he will ever come back... I understand your anger, even if I am not even close to following your extreme ideals, please tell me the code, the proof that you are not one of the Spetznas or the Nazi`s. "Eliza"

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Is Mike here? Mike Hunt? Has anyone seen Mike Hunt? Yes teacher, he is home sick with the flu.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue Refrigerator

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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