Why do chickens have feathers? Because chickens are birds and birds have feathers.

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Why is five afraid of six? Because six seven eight. (Note: The language of numbers is Subject-Object-Verb, rather than Subject-Verb-Object like English.)

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A devout Islamic man walks into a weapons of mass destruction store he is shocked and appalled at how easily such dangerous weapons can be bought.

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Why were you at a funeral? Someone died.

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What did the boy with no legs get? A treadmill.

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Two frogs go to the bar only to leave because frogs can't open up doors.

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what kind of pizzas did the twin tower executives order on 9-11? two large "planes"

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Gary.

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Why did Sally fall off the swings? Because she had no arms Knock Knock Who's there? Not sally

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-Why did the chicken cross the road? '' I dont know '' -Because it would cross the road and over to you. -Knock knock? '' Who's there?'' - CHICKEN!!!!!!!

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I like my sex how i like my steak Pink and Bloody

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A black, white, Asian, and Mexican are walking down the street. This is showing a good diverse community.

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A guy walks into a bar. The bartender says "Why the long face?" The guy didn't respond because he was deaf.

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So these two girls have a cup .

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Studies prove that bald people have no hair?.

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Your momma soo fat.... that if she doesnt start exercising and eating right she will be more likely to get adult onset diabetes.

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What do you call the man with no arms or legs, swimming in the bay? Bob.

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I think everybody should have a penis.

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Two men are walking down the street. They both don't make eye contact and continue walking.

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What do you call a person with 4 arms? A normal person. (fore arms) (meant to be audible)

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Did you hear about that creepy guy on Facebook? He was un-friended

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Why did the scientist go to the hospital? because he was experimenting with dangerous chemicals, and they exploded in his unsuspecting face. He doesn't have skin now.

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Thank you Nero, this might not sound apropiate at all, but I am in love with you and have always been, and just want you to know that what I love the most about you is your spirit, your kindness, and sincerely, how you make me feel safe, I think its that you are dead honest to the point where you insult people asking for your opinion, I never had to question what you really mean or want, you just say it out loud, I love you, I realize it must be strange hearing that from someone you see as a daughter, I remember my father too well to consider you one, but I guess I always considered you a hot big brother of sorts. You are 32 huh? You always knew did you not? Why that secret of all things? Ill be arriving as soon as those trained killers of yours show by, and man are they fast and loyal, only you could inspire that love. I know your name is Nero, but I would not mind calling you Axel or at least knight, that's what you have always been for me.

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Eric went for a poo in the public toilets. After he finished, he realised that there was no toilet roll. So he had to just pull up his pants and put up with his sshitty arse for the rest of the day. Unfortunately, he was in a board meeting and when he went in he stank of shit and it was a very uncomfortable feeling.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops