What's the difference between you and a sick duck? I forget the rest but your mother's a whore.

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what did the astronomer say when he lost his telescope? where is my telescope?

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what's inflation? a hollow cost.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because the 99p mcdonalds mayo chicken was popular in the coop.

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in a car crash an entire family is killed from death until they all die

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Woody Allen once said, "I have had many romantic relationships in my life that were both complex and humorous."

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How do you make lady gaga cry? Give her bad romance haven't you heard this joke before......DUMBASS

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Why did Kim Kardashian's and Kris Humphries marriage last so long? It didn't

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A Russian gentleman walks into a bar and requests a vodka which the bartender promptly supplies. Shortly thereafter a Turkish gentleman enters escorting a Llama on a leash and requests a vodka to which the bartender responds: "Your animal is not allowed on the premise, I am going to have to ask you to leave." The Turkish gentleman apologizes for his ignorance of the local customs and excuses himself, and shortly thereafter the Russian finishes his Vodka, pays, and leaves as well.

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Why did Kallum come to Getaway? Because he ran out of hats

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What is the connection between a blonde and a halogen headlamp? There is none, one is a female human being with blonde hair and the other is a headlamp with a halogen lightbulb.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? The Police. She told me she was nineteen.

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roses are red violets are blue get to close to me ill have to give aids to you!

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WHat did the Somalian girl get for Christmas? AIDS

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Josh, this is your mother. I was wondering if you wanted me to bring my lube and strapon to bed tonight. Wait never mind about the strapon because i have my dick to use.

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why didnt the old man go to his sons birthday he died.........nah i lied he went went

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I rode in to town on an ass... ur momas ass!!

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What did tyler say to Jake? My pussy is wet jew

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Whats worse than stubbing your toe? Sandy hook

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There once was a man from Peru, he couldn't fit into his shoe. He went to Brazil bought a big. Swallowed it and died.

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whats sad about 4 black guy drivein off a cliff in a cadalic a wast of good cadalic

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How do you remind your kids of family? You brand them with the family crest.

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Why did the Mexican jump of the roof? Because he had a serious meth addiction that was destroying his family and he could not live with the awful things he did to get his fix.

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what did the boy say to the alien? ET i will protect you. The alien slaps him for being stupid

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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