Why did the dog have no legs? Because its previous owner had cut them off.

What is a black, yellow like liquid that contains carbon dioxide, usually kept in a can, and is not coke? Pepsi.

What do you call a discrase of a living enviorment? African huts there so muddy

Q: What did the Rabbi say to the butcher? A: "Do you have the time?"

Why didn't the man fall off his bicycle? Because He wasn't riding a bicycle!

What did one cannibal say to the other while they were eating a clown? I don't know... That action was so barbarous that it freaked me out, and I was no longer in the vicinity of the area. Since I don't have supersonic hearing, I couldn't pick up anything they were saying...

What did the alphabetical soup spell for little Bobby? U gOt SUzie prEgnant ....... aGaiN

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit by a passing car.

whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? the pizza doesn't scream when it goes in the oven. By darragh Hamilton

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In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

What do you call an arab with a beard? How cares what his name is just shoot him!

To Daniel You must have been born on a highway cuz thats where most accidents happen

What did the mexican do when 3 INS workers came to his house? He showed them his papers and it turns out he was a natural born US citizen. The mexican then proceeded to invite the INS into his home for a cup of coffee but they respectfully declined

why should not women able to vote? because their stupid and should not vote at all

What do you give a homeless person? Poop in a bottle.

What's the difference between a portuguese widow and a llama? One is a portuguese widow and the other isn't.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens have 2 legs

people magazine

Why did Lindsay Lohan talk to her car? Because she's insane

What's green and black? Grass with wheels.

What do you call a man with a shovel in his head? An ambulance.

A teenager walked into a bar. A drunk man got angry and beat him to death with a club.

YOUR MUM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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