Why do black guys always have sex on their mind? Because they are men.

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A man dressed as a woman gets hit in the nuts they fall to the ground in pain

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Why did the student get expelled from a Christian school? He continually beat other students between class periods.

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Why did the blonde ask her doctor if she could get a new butt? She is insecure about its appearance and believes reconstructive anus surgery is the only solution.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in your penis.

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what's the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? when you slap a mosquito it stops sucking:)

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Jesse likes to jack off and lick the white stuff off of his balls and digest it

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Did you hear about the dyslexic atheist that doesn't believe in god? His disorder has no effect on his belief system.

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what do you call a bunch of crap at the bottom of the ocean? A shitwreck!

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Knock Knock! Who is there? Me. Let me in. Oh, okay, Come in.

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Justin Beiber sings. people don't listen.

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck had AIDS?

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This one time at Concentration camp.... My friends all died cause they were chosem in the Selection

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What's black and white and red all over? A referee eating a red Popsicle on a hot summers day.

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Why couldn't Cait walk her dog? She's been paralyzed from the waist down since she was 5 after her and her parents got into a car accident and her parents died.

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what is the difference between a jew and a pizza? Jews are people and regularly attend a synagogue and pizza is and italian food that many people find to be enjoyable to eat

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How many people were trampled on Black Friday this year? Not enough.

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Hazel and Gus are two teenagers who share an acerbic wit, a disdain for the conventional, and a love that sweeps them on a journey. Their relationship is all the more miraculous given that Hazel's other constant companion is an oxygen tank, Gus jokes about his prosthetic leg, and they met and fell in love at a cancer support group.

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What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? one's a scum-sucking bottom feeder, the other is a lawyer

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I was just thinking in something I swear ... I am still Just, wait, i'll be good

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What do you call a women with two black eyes? Someone trapped in the cycle of violence that is domestic abuse. The few friends and family members she still speaks with tell she should leave. They don't know about the last time she threatened to leave him, when he held a gun to her throat and screamed "You try an leave me I'll kill you and your precious god damn babies!" Now she suffers silently for fear of what he might do to her family, but is increasingly worried about the way her husband has begun looking at their 13 year old daughter. Every night she kneels at the foot of her bed and prays for death, over the sounds of her own sobbing and her husbands drunken rage. Also she is a slow learner.

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knock knock who's there? Jehovah's witness GOOD BYE!

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Two guys walk into a bar.The barmen says "sorry we are closed." So the two men reply "There isn't a closed sign on the door and the door was open so we assumed it was OK to come in and have a drink". The barman says "Sorry we are closed at the moment but come back in 20 minutes and I can serve you". So the men leave and come back for a drink in 25 minutes time.

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Koolaid is red, Poweraid is blue, Gatorade is yellow, My urine is brown... looks like i have a bladder infection.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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