What happened while Thomas crossed the street? He got hit by a truck. What happened to Billy? He was Thomas's Siamese twin, and he too met the same fate.

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What did the squirrel say to Justin Bieber? We both enjoy nuts.

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Why did humpty dumpty fall off a wall? Well it turns out that he was a raging psycopath. to add on, he was also a suicidal

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How did the Muslim pilot die? He had a fatal heart attack while flying over the Atlantic and as a result the 300 passengers died by drowning.

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what do you call an octopus with 9 tentacles? a male octopus

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How many wheelchair users does it take to change a light bulb? - They are not physically capable

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Guess what? I like trains.

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An optimistic person says the glass is half full Pessimistic people say the glass is half empty Engineers say the glass is 2 times the size it needs to be.

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What didn't the man piss on the dead baby? Because that is just morally wrong. Instead, he reported it to the police and aided the cause of justice.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

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Why are all the tech support people from India? That's where the majority of call centers are located.

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What's worse than a baby on a pitchfork? Two babies on a pitchfork.

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Q: What do you call a dog with no legs? A: It doesn't matter what you call him, he isn't going to come.

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Q: How many Jews can u fit in a bathtub? A: Well it depends if you use their ashes.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was an attempted suicide. His family left him, he had been in and out of rehab for a terrible cocaine addiction for over ten years, and was still having nightmares about his abusive past.

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What did Zeus say to Hades? Nothing. Both are mythological beings created by the Greek civilization to explain why many things in the world happened, mostly because of a lack of modern science.

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Hey, I just met you, And this is crazy. But I have Alzheimer's... Hey, I just met you...

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There are no stupid Questions just stupid people

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What's the only thing better than winning a gold medal in the special olympics? Not being retarded.

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What does the man do to his meat? He beats it.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Me ill kill u,

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The original Moral Man has left Horsehead network, but I will keep monitoring this section for like 3 hours... Then probably never again on this shit site it barely works ffs! Moral: "Turn every stone, and you might find a penny, turn every penny and you might find a stone that stone is in our shoe, kick it away, crush it, destroy it"

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A fat man walks into a gym, and comes out fatter

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What's brown and sticky? Feces.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops