What do you give a homeless person? Poop in a bottle.

What's the difference between a portuguese widow and a llama? One is a portuguese widow and the other isn't.

In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

What did the alphabetical soup spell for little Bobby? U gOt SUzie prEgnant ....... aGaiN

What do you call an arab with a beard? How cares what his name is just shoot him!

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To Daniel You must have been born on a highway cuz thats where most accidents happen

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit by a passing car.

What did one cannibal say to the other while they were eating a clown? I don't know... That action was so barbarous that it freaked me out, and I was no longer in the vicinity of the area. Since I don't have supersonic hearing, I couldn't pick up anything they were saying...

What did the mexican do when 3 INS workers came to his house? He showed them his papers and it turns out he was a natural born US citizen. The mexican then proceeded to invite the INS into his home for a cup of coffee but they respectfully declined

Why didn't the man fall off his bicycle? Because He wasn't riding a bicycle!

whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? the pizza doesn't scream when it goes in the oven. By darragh Hamilton

what do you get when you mix peanut butter and jelly? a sweaty black guy

What did the text-to-speech reader say when the 12 year old boy played around with it? "Ass ass ass ass, ass ass ass ass."

"DUDE! THERE IS A KNIFE IN YOUR LEG!" "SERIOUSLY!"

What do you call a discrase of a living enviorment? African huts there so muddy

Why did the dog have no legs? Because its previous owner had cut them off.

Did you ever hear about that rich Mexican?? No. Yeah, me neither.

Just friends, they too pretend to be you and copy the way you write and express yourself, I told them to stop though, Azure threatened someone here a cultist of sorts I think, that does not exactly put us in a better light with the people that where getting our messages, and yes they are coded, I sincerely had no idea though,

Q: What did the Rabbi say to the butcher? A: "Do you have the time?"

Micheal Curran...that is all.

The feds ruined the first underground, so in order for this to not happen you joined them?

What is better than a 50-inch wide plasma flat screen TV? A 51-inch wide plasma flat screen TV.

Q: What does a really poor kid say to his friends? A: I hate over working for 75 cents an hour...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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