Q:What do you call a cow with no legs? A:A hamburger.

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A man goes up to an old friend and says: "Help me, I just found out that my friend is gay! What should I do!?" The other man replies: "If there is no problem, I cannot help you... Yet, there is one. Your homophobia. I suggest that you see a therapist immediately and I hope that you can get over the fact of the contemplation of a sexuality."

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What did the young Muslim man have attached to him? A book-bag, it was is his first week college and he eager for an education.

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? A present.

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a camel walks into a bar. it is kicked out because camels are not supposed to be in bars, there camels.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock! Who's there? Not Sally.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know I'm not a bird physcologist

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Man: I just bought this hearing aid Friend: How much did it cost Man: No it's 8 o'clock

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Why did the car stop? It ran out of gas.

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Roses are red. Violets are grey. People hate me. Mongoose.

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rozes r read violots r bue i cannt soell causse ima bliend

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Ten green bottles hanging on the wall, Ten green bottles hanging on the wall, And if one alcoholic should one day stroll along: There'll be no more bottles hanging on the wall.

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What is round and bad-tempered? A vicious circle

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why was the black guy that was smoking weed in his car not sent to jail? when the cop pulled him over he thought he was black the way he was dancing but turned out to be white but that just looked black when hes dancing.

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? No? Neither have they.

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Q: What's the difference between a trampoline and a bag of dead babies? A: I take off my shoes when I jump on a trampoline.

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You know what's worse than finding a real joke on antijoke.com? AIDS

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A Blonde Goes On "Who Wants To Be A Millionaire"

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Howmany licks does it take till you get to the tootsie roll center of tootsie pop? Well, The answer is not constant. There are many variables that need to be taken into account. Though the ph level of human saliva is a neutral seven it can vary about 2 tenths of a point from person to person. This is a factor that needs to be considered along with the size of the tongue, roughness of the tongue, and at what speed the licking is taking place at. After taking all these variables into consideration, the average number of licks it would take untill the chocolate center of a tootsie pop is approximately, 3 .

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A black man walks into a bar in an all white neighborhood. He has a couple of drinks, pays for them, and politely calls a taxi for a ride home.

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how do make a condom fly around the room? Piss it off!

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What do you get when you stab a man in the leg with a knife? A court summons because you have committed a horrible crime

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What do you call a black man with no job? Unemployed

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like if u think princess kenny is the fairest maiden in all the land. if u dont, disregard this message.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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