A Blonde Goes On "Who Wants To Be A Millionaire"

thumb_up thumb_down +7

A black man walks into a bar in an all white neighborhood. He has a couple of drinks, pays for them, and politely calls a taxi for a ride home.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What do you call a black man with no job? Unemployed

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Howmany licks does it take till you get to the tootsie roll center of tootsie pop? Well, The answer is not constant. There are many variables that need to be taken into account. Though the ph level of human saliva is a neutral seven it can vary about 2 tenths of a point from person to person. This is a factor that needs to be considered along with the size of the tongue, roughness of the tongue, and at what speed the licking is taking place at. After taking all these variables into consideration, the average number of licks it would take untill the chocolate center of a tootsie pop is approximately, 3 .

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Ten green bottles hanging on the wall, Ten green bottles hanging on the wall, And if one alcoholic should one day stroll along: There'll be no more bottles hanging on the wall.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

how do make a condom fly around the room? Piss it off!

thumb_up thumb_down +7

why was the black guy that was smoking weed in his car not sent to jail? when the cop pulled him over he thought he was black the way he was dancing but turned out to be white but that just looked black when hes dancing.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What is round and bad-tempered? A vicious circle

thumb_up thumb_down +7

You know what's worse than finding a real joke on antijoke.com? AIDS

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Charlie Sheen

thumb_up thumb_down +7

what do you call a cat that cant meow? Charlie Sheen.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What do you call a cow without legs? Disabled.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

why did Dayrl win the wheelchair race? Because he had working legs.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

I cried because I had no shoes until I met a man with no feet... ...then I made fun of him and laughed.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What do call the time things don't go the way you plan them? Reality. bitch

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What do you do when you see someone from the kkk? Accept what you saw and move on with your day

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Your mama's so fat, that it's ruined her self-esteem.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Q: What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car? A: "Get in the car."

thumb_up thumb_down +7

So a blond, a brunette, a ninja, a pirate, a priest, a rabbi, a mathematician and an engineer all walk into a bar, and the bartender says, "What, is this some kind of joke?"

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What's easier than taking candy from a baby? Almost nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Q: why was the gay guy sad A: Becasue he was stright.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Q: What did the dragon say to the other dragon A: Nothing they did'nt exicest.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Whats brown and a fag? A bundle of sticks

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know I'm not a bird physcologist

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops