What did the boy with no arms or legs get for his birthday? A bike

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A man wakes up in his bed and looks at the clock. He realises he is gonna be late for work. He quickly gets out of bed, into the bathroom, has a shower, puts his deodorant on and brushes his teeth, gets dressed, and goes in his car. He drives out of his garage and drives to his work but gets stuck in traffic. He then gets to the car park of his work and parks his car. He gets out, goes up the elevator to his floor, when the elevator door opens to his floor, he quickly says hello to Terrance and goes to his bosses office. And guess what the boss says? You're late.

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Why did the little boy commit suicide? Because his dad molested him.

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A man walks into a pet shop. He says to the shopkeeper, "Excuse me, do you have any dogs going cheap?" The shopkeeper replies "We feel that we price our animals reasonably, but the cheapest type of dog we have is £50." The man realises that, unfortunately, he cannot afford a dog so instead he purchases a goldfish. It wasn't the same.

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What do you say if you see a floating TV at night? Wow a floating TV. It's amazing how far technology has progressed throughout the years.

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why did stuart buy an ipad from the mall. because he wanted an ipad

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Why did Jenny fall off her bike? She had no arms Knock knock Who's there Not Jenny

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Why did the girl fall off the swingset? Because she got hit by a refridgerator.

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What did the mexican say to the black person? Hey there! How are you today?

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a black man, a jew, a mexican and an irish man walked into a bar and the bartender says: This is joke right??

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Your mother's so fat she occupies more space than a thin person does and is more likely to bump into environmental objects.

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Q. What did the Muffins say to the man? A. Nothing, muffins are inanimate objects therefore unable to speak.

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I'm getting sick of holocaust jokes can't you Nazi Anne Frankly I'm sick of it

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Yo mamma is so fat, that she's going on a diet and is exercising regularly to lose wait.

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did you hear the one about the elephant with a screwdriver? me neither...

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What did the Mexican say to the Pirate? Can I have a pound for my bus, pal?

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What's sad about black people that drink grape soda and eat fried chicken? The stereotypes are true.

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Why was the camel sad he wasnt, camels dont have feelings

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What did Helen Keller name her dog? She didn't, her father named the dog because he was aware of his daughters innability to speak.

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antijoke is the best website.

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HOW MANY CRACK-HEADS DOES IT TAKE TO CHANGE A LIGHT BULB? NONE, THERE AIN'T NO ELECTRICITY IN THE CRACKHOUSE!!!

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was a registered sex offender.

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How many wheelchair users does it take to change a light bulb? - They are not physically capable

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Roses are red, and many other colors too.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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