knock knock... who's there... i dont know i aint got a house

when god created an asian he said 'Crispy"

What are annoying? Ads.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: To get to the other side

What starts with "F" and ends in "uck" Firetruck.

Why does Michael J. Fox always have his martinis shaken? He thinks they taste better that way.

Maybe we simply need to keep the door open, but one cannot bring happiness to others, until one is happy oneself. Do I change something within you Red?

What is brown and sticky? A lot of things are brown and sticky

What goes in dry and comes out wet and sticky? Bubble Gum

Q: why did the black man kill the white man? A: he was clinically depressed, mentally unstable, and had a grudge against the white man that had nothing to do with his race.

whats white and smells like onions? an onion..

noah is a scrub jungle

Knock knock? Who's there? Set up. Set up who? Punch line!

what is blue and smells like fish? blue fish ;)

Why does the rabbit go in the hole? because that's where it lives.

What is the difference between a black man and a piece of fried chicken? Fried chicken is a breaded meal that is high in calories whereas a black man is an unedible human being with feelings.

A Blond and a Brunette are falling down to their deaths, which one hits the ground first? Does it matter? They both die anyway.

what do chinese kids make for fathers day? shoes

Why did the man go to McDonalds? Because he was a pedophile.

So there were these three guys on a plane, one with a ruptured hernia, one with a stomach infection and one with a raging case of gingivitis. Half way through the flight the pilot said, "unfortunately we will not it make to our destination... we are crashing." The three men then went to get the parachutes. they then say that there was only two. the man with the ruptured hernia picked one up and threw it out the door and pushed out the guy with the stomach infection. The guy with the raging case of gingivitis said, "why did you do that... we could have used that parachute!" the man with the ruptured hernia responded, "taco." and jumped out of the plane. the pilot then goes on the intercom and says," sorry. false alarm. we will not be crashing, please enjoy the rest of your flight."

What did the slutty blonde get her boyfriend for Valentine's Day? Nothing because she had died of AIDS months ago.

There were two friends, a girl and a boy. The girl had a ribbon tied to her neck, and every day the boy asked her why, yet she'd never tell him. They grew up together, and fell in love and still, she wouldn't tell him why she had the ribbon on her neck. They got married, and grew old, and still she wouldn't tell him. But one day, she said to him 'I'll show you why I keep this on my neck' and she took it off and her head fell off.

A man comes home after a long days work. It is late at night and he gets in bed with his wife who is already asleep. Later that night he gets up for a glass of water and returns to the bed room to see that his wife doesn't appear to be breathing and calls 911. He then realizes that this isn't his house and he leaves.

What do you not want to call a african american that begins with an N and ends with an R? A Neighbor!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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