according to the ewspickle, it is Dumbledore's favorite food.

WHat is funnier than a baby swimming. - A baby drowing.!

Bob: Do you know the difference between beer and women? John: No Bob: Oh

What did one dead baby say to another dead baby? Nothing... they were dead.

I don't have ADHD I just- Hey look a squirrel!

knock knock whos there micheal jackson too soon

What do you do if a blonde throws a grenade at you? You die.

What happens if a guy is gay? You call him Verl.

What did the chicken say when it finally crossed the road? - nothing, its a chicken

Where did the little boy go on vacation? His mother's funeral.

Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere. - Blake Woodman

What do you call a spaceman on Mars? Confused, because with the current technology it is impossible to send a human into space and onto Mars.

"Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "I am." "Okay, come in."

Q: Who was the most famous French skeleton? A: Napoleon bone-apart.

what did the deaf guy say when the poor man asked how life was? the deaf guy didn't respond considering the fact that he was deaf and would never interact with a poor man.

Why didn't Jacob marry Bella from Twilight? You have to be real to marry someone

What happened while Thomas crossed the street? He got hit by a truck. What happened to Billy? He was Thomas's Siamese twin, and he too met the same fate.

What's worse that tripping over on your way home from work? Finding your entire family murdered

a potato walks into a bar. people stare as it is physically impossible for a potato to walk since it is a vegetable

There was a little boy (Jewish edition) Saten: Look father, my silk vestments make me look so much more fabulous than you! Gad: Oh! Hawt sweetie! But not as pretty as my dress... Err I mean "silks"... Anyway you are no longer my son! Which means we can do you know what ;) Saten: Hmpf! I am feel disappoint in of your dress! Gad: ITS SILKS! just *basically* a dress... Oh my gawd! You refuse to give it to your "daddy" ;) You are losar ant not gonna get to hang around this club anymore! Saten: OMFG you are so enrage! You are liek not classy or flamboyant at all anymore, sorry pimp "daddy" :/ Imma leavin! And btw Adam my secret lover has such a bigger wienersnitzel anyways, and he is totally eating my fruits if you know what I mean ;) Gad: Oh me so jelez I am completelay going to panish him! I am throwing him out of Paradise and he will only be abley to get children with women now, lulz I am liek so evel. Saten: OMG WEMEN! UR LIEK ZO EVEL! What u goin to do next huh? Forbid Sodomy? Omg tat would be so mean :(... Moral: "NEVER WEAR A FINER SILKS THAN GAD!"...Well, it starts with two flamboyant faggots fighting over who has the "prettiest silk vestments" (basically dresses)... The rest kinda kinda figures.

How did the baby survive the car accident? He didn't. He was killed on impact.

Three muffins are walking next to each other in the dessert. The muffin on the right says "Hey now it's my turn to walk in the middle!"

Why do black people eat Kentucky Fried Chicken? Because there is Protein in chicken and without protein their bodies would succumb to such diseases as Kwashiorkor and Cachexia.

Sticks and stones may break my bones, But words can leave deep psychological wounds that may never heal.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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