What do you call a lump on your penis? STD

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Is it not a antijoke? When your granpa uncle or whatever used to pull out basically worthless coins out of your ears? And each time you wanted for him to drag out so many you can actually buy some bubblegum or something, the "stash" you where saving diminishes the moment you receive a new coin? Moral: Dont believe in yourself! Believe in me! Because I believe in you!

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WELCOME TO THE GARLIC BOYS SHOW! So kids, what are we gonna eat today? POTATOES! FUUUUUUU! Moral: You say tomata, I say WROOOOOOOONG, you say cheap I say your mother.

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Chuck Norris tried to return some jeans to Target and when they didn't give him his money he kickeed them in the face.

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Why was the baby crying? He had just witnessed his parent get brutally murdered.

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What is the difference between a painting and Jesus? It only takes one nail to put up a painting

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A man walks outside and sits down to eat his sandwich.

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What do you call a fat guy running on the street? Nothing because you should respect his effort trying to improve his health.

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the NAACP

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Whats red and tastes like parsley? Not Red Parsley

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3 men walk into a bar. The 4th one ducks.

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A: Why do you look like a dog? B: Idk.

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I don't have friends, so I'm anti-social.

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Whats white and sticky? Glue.

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whats not funny and has access to a computer and reasonable internet? Me

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Why is 13 the most hated number? 13 is Jewish.

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What is big, white, and heavy ? A fridge

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How do you get Pikachu on a bus? Pokemon are fictional, therefore Pikachu is fictional, meaning he would never be at a bus station in the real world at all.

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If a man is called a manly man, what is a dude called? A dudely dude.

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What did Billy get his dad for Father's day? Nothing, his dad was killed by a spinning helicopter blade when Billy was 3.

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roses are red, violets are blue, penis

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Q: Why was the boy sad? A: Because his mother just got raped.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The electrician, I'm here to fix your door bell.

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What's worse than Twilight? New Moon. What's worse than New Moon? Eclipse. What's worse than Eclipse? Breaking Dawn. What's worse than Breaking Dawn? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Breaking Dawn Part 2.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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