Why did Suzy fall of the swing? Because she had no arms!

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Why can't kids do drugs in school? Because it's against the rules.

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What's red and fun to drink through a bendy straw? Period blood

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Trees are also red, "Honey, please call the fire department!"

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there were two cyclists cycling at a steady pace down a main road in china, one irish and the other chinese. now they happened to be cycling at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace. why did the irish cyclist get pulled over and the chinese not? because the irish cyclist had in fact brutally raped and murdered a young child in his home town and then fled the country to china.

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How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way. ernkso

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Mooses

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Cameron is a r e t a r d

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are running from the police. The police catch them, and they are sentenced to jail.

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Word Problem Q.John has 32 candy bars. He eats twenty eight of them. What does he have now? A. Diabetes. John has Diabetes.

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Why did the boy fall over? Because he broke his leg. Why did the second boy fall over? Because he was having a seizure.

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Who is fat, stupid and pretty dam ugly? (hint: look in mirror)

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What's white and black and red all over A nun with a spear throug her head

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what did one elephant say to the other one? nothing silly elepehants dont talk

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What's worse than an arrow to the knee? -A bullet in the head.

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How tall is a tree? Taller than the ground

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Yo Mama's so fat when she fell out of the tree she hit the ground very, very hard.

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Chlamydia

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There are two muffins in an oven. One muffin says to the other "dang, it's really hot in here." Realizing that muffins can not talk the other muffin wakes up to a very hungry man biting his face.

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Why did the man give money to the Jew? Why would a man give money to a Jew?

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What's better than winning a gold medal at the paralympics? Winning two gold medals.

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My wife came up to me and said, "I want you to make me scream with 2 fingers!" So I poked her in the eyes!

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why is stu taking so long to post a joke because he is autistic

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What's the difference between an apple and a banana? One's an apple.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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