I haven't left my basement in 29 years

Once upon a time there was a man sleeping, Then he woke up.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Against city ordinates, an old woman was keeping chickens in her suburban back yard. One escaped, and there was no where else to go.

Mogok Papiti.

How do you blindfold an asian? With a blindfold.

A: Ask me if I'm a tree! B: Are you a tree? A: No.

copy me and i will kill you

Why is Satan evil? Because he makes people eat apples.

Justin's life

An asian woman was driving along the freeway one day when a police officer pulled her over and arrested her, The officer arrested her because she had killed her husband 5 years ago and she thought she had gotten away with it.

A blond, a brunette, and a red head are stranded on an island. They all die of starvation.

Who's obsessed with death and love to make jokes about it? The majority of the contributors in this site.

Guess what else smells like tuna!?! A dead tuna fish in a can

Have u seen Ray Charles' piano "no" neither did he

If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

What has straight black lines and is square? A refferee.

What's funnier than 100 dead babies? Everything.

How did the chef bake 20 muffins for the king? My name is Bob.

Hey, in case you are around and still wonder how he got out. Anonymous tip from yours truly, if he had remained there, you would all have taken the blame. Just stay away from the deep web, and I wont be forced to come get all of you as well. For a long while I was suspicious that you might have been leaking information regarding me and all of us, but then the rules changed and information regarding Point Zero, subtle hints and such, began spreading, it has been removed, nobody will know what Intel was sold, so yeah, he was a mole, he is no more, for this I am sorry.

Whats the difference between a bottle of coke and a black man stuck in a phone booth? one of them is comparing himself to a bottle of coke, the other is a bottle of pepsi

Two men were walking down the road when one of them spotted an old lamp lying in a ditch. After examining the lamp's handiwork for several seconds one man rubbed the lamp with his shirt sleeve. The men then continued down the road.

Person #1: Hello captain obvious. Person #2: Hello.

person: Ask me if i'm a tree other person: are you a tree? person: no

Why didn't the jew eat pork? He was vegetarian.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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