Do you know the difference between a dinosaur and a slice of bread? No. You're pretty stupid then.

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why was there no toothpaste left in the toothpaste tub? someone squeezed it all in a drawer

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Whats worse that having cold soup? Cancer

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Why did the horse say moo? Because it's a cow

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A man wakes up after a long night with a girl he recently met. He pulls out a cigarette, and looks for his lighter, but can not find it. He asks the girl if she has a lighter and she replies "There might be some matches in the top drawer of my dresser." He opens the top drawer and finds some matches.

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Roses are black Violets are black I'm blind

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How do you call a guy that ran over 10 children A bad driver

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what's worse than people who aren't funny? ryan vallee

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Did you know that onions is the only food that makes you cry? Oh? Really? Positive. what if I threw a coconut at you're face. ...

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What did boy with now arms and no legs get for christmas A pogo-stick

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Your mother is so fat, when she stepped on a scale, it read quite a large number. She resolved to live healthier and exercise more.

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How do you make a retard make a sound like a dog? Douse him in gasoline and light him on fire. WOOF!

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Tom: Knock knock! Guy: Who's there? Tom: Carrot. Guy: Impossible.

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How many shots do you have to take to start feeling light-headed? Ask JFK.

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Seven monkeys jumping on the bed. One fell off and bumped his head! Momma called the doctor, And the doctor said, "I'm sorry, Mrs.Monkey, but your son has suffered a severe concussion, and will be severely mentally impaired for the rest of his life."

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So once upon a midnight dreery.... In a galaxy far far away that takes place in the past but resembles a technologically advanced future, an evil sith overlord took an innocent Jedi knight and turned him in a cybernetic killing machine. In the end, he dies

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When life gives you lemons you make orange juice so people will say "How the hell did you do that?"

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You can pick your friends, and you can pick your nose, but you can't rob a bank! That's a felony. ;)

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Matt Gregory Harrington is a bender, pylon, hoser, duster tripod, and puck bunny!!!!

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Who is the most famous black person? Michael Jackson, except he's not black.

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A: Did you know Helen Keller had a treehouse? B: No. A: Neither did she.

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If the human population held hands around around the equator A significant portion of them would drown.

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Why did the piano explode? Beacause someone planted an explosive inside of it.

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Why did the kid get a bicycle for his birthday? Cause his father is a respectable parent who loves his child.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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