what do u call an elephant in a car? nothing elephants cant fit in cars

Who stole the cookie from the cookie jar Was it you? No

why did nick leave school? bECAUSE HE WAS RETARDED

You walk into a plane full of Arabs talking about how much they hate America. You arrive at your destination enlightened about the problems in American society

How do you confuse a blond? Nordic mytholigi. That is, if shes american

Knock Knock. Who's there? Boo. Boo who? Doctor Harold Boo, I was your grandmother's primary caregiver, I'm here to inform you that she died of a massive heart attack.

Cool I just got a free Minecraft gift code at http://freeminecraftgiftcode.net

What did the girl say to her ex? Fuck you.

roses are red, violets are blue, i dont like to rhyme, but i do like to poo.

Q:why is walmart so big? A:Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of Walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory .

Why does an ostrich have such a long neck? Because its head is so far from its body.

how do you confuse a blonde? ask if she wants a cake...then rape her

Did You Hear about the Black Guy That went to College?....Neither Did I...

Why did the white policeman shoot all the black people in a house and not the white people Because the black guys were holding the white guys hostage

How long does it take a person to steal a television? Many variables could determine said ability to successfully steal a television. Such variables depend on sub-variables such as weight of the television, whether the television is a store, an upper-class citizen's home, or in a "ghetto" apartment. A main variable could be the race of the thief in question. African Americans are scientifically more likely to steal a television faster compared to a Caucasian. Yet a downside to being an African American is the fact that they are more likely to be called in for questioning or arrested on the spot at their broken down home. Caucasians are less likely to be questioned and if caught will most likely obtain the proper amount of bribery money in which to pay off the police.

Yo mama is so stupid... She didn't graduate high school.

There's a football player who walks into a bar and sees a gay guy. The gay guy says, "So you're a football player, right?" The football player says, "Yes." The gay guy says, "I have a game of football myself. It's called fart football. It's where you drink a mug of beer in less than five seconds and then you drop your pants and fart for the extra point." The gay guy goes first. He drinks the mug of beer in less than five seconds and farts. The football player goes. He drinks the mug of beer in less than five seconds then he drops his pants and before he farts, the gay guy says, "BLOCK THAT KICK! BLOCK THAT KICK!"

What happens when a bunch of animals break into your house... they eat you.

what happened to the man that got shot.... He died.. 3 secs after

Why did the dog cross the road? Because he saw another dog

how come the tadpoles dad told him he can't be a nurse? he has 2 b a frog!

How do you creep out a clown? Pet him softly and call him kitty kat while making a guttural sound that is not socially acceptable in mainstream American society.

Michael Jackson walks into a bar. Everyone runs out, screaming, "AH, a dead guy is walking!"

1: Knock, knock 2: Go away!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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