What did Marsha say when she ate the apple pie? Nothing. It would be rude for her to talk with her mouth full.

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A man jumped off a 30 story building. What did he learn? Nothing. He died instatly when he hit the ground.

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What did the Chinese man say to the Japanese man Nothing as they have never met

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Freddie Mercury died of AIDS. Many consider him a musical hero.

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Why couldn't Jimmy breathe? He had a knife in his throat!

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What part of a vegetable are you not supposed to eat? His wheelchair.

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whats wores than eating a vag. a gaint vag eating you.

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I'm trying to find out how many people in the world have Alzheimers, do you? No. Bananas.

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Why did the boy fall off the bike? Because he was a paraplegic.

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The awkard moment when you realize you either have cancer, are pregnant, or a combination of the two.

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Yo mama's so fat, that she died from obesity.

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Why did my car stop suddenly? I had arrived at my appropriate destination.

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What's worse than an earthquake? Two earthquakes. What's worse than two earthquakes? Three earthquakes. What's worse than three earthquakes? The world exploding.

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What is worse than getting a cold ? Finding a dead baby in your mailbox

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What did the bad boy get for Christmas? Incurable cancer.

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yo momma is so fat she ate the rest of the joke

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Parents were talking about a particular whore house and tries to keep it secret to their son. Father: Bob and I saw the house near the river, its a whore house full of prostitutes. Mother: Shhh! Our son is listening. The Son enters the room. Son: Don't mind me, I know that area. Both parents were angry: So you've been there!? Don't deny, you know! Son: Just because I know doesn't mean I've been there. I know the moon has less gravity but I haven't been there.

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Your mom came to my house last night. We played chess.

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knock knock who's there? Ah Maj. Ah Maj who? (say it outloud)

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your momma is so poor that she is on welfare.

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Whats better than winning an award? Not having your family shot to death

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a pool? Phil, because that's his name.

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Roses are black Violets are black Everything is black. I am blind.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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