What's brown,green got four legs and can fall out of a tree and kill you? A snooker table.

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Whats worse then walking into a door? getting shot in the head by a 10ft squirrel holding 44.magnum and a slice of cheese in the other

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Q: How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: One.

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why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 was scary.. made by Kevin Kool

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A blond was walking alone down a street one night. Then she was suddenly mugged and raped. She reported her attacker but he was never caught.

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Guess what else smells like tuna!?! A dead tuna fish in a can

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Why did the bones cross the street? They didn't. The dogs ate them.

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What did the fat man say to everyone? Hey everyone! I am i fat man!

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What's the difference between a picnic table and a Mexican? A picnic table can support a family of four.

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Why was Martin Luther King shot? The shooter strongly disagreed with his viewpoints.

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Just got back from the corner store. Bought 3 corners.

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-Bumper Sticker- Honk if you love Jesus. (Text while driving if you want to meet him)

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Why did the shark eat the girl? Because she was ugly

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How do you get 100 Jews into a Volkswagon? You don't. It's impossible to fit that many people into a car that small.

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Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A.Because that's where it wanted to go.

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It's raining, its pouring, the old man is snoring. He bumps his head, and is quickly rushed to the ER for serious head trauma

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what do you call a black man in the bank holding a bag of money. One wealthy man

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Mike lost his arms in a car accident. Knock knock Who's there? Not Mike.

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What`s that CREAM that comes out of you when your mom puts a WHIP on you with a switch? WHIP CREAM!

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69.

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Why did Abraham Lincoln fall asleep at the movie? He was shot several times in the back of the head.

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Why did Kristi drop her chap-stick? Kristi was of the many children held in hostage of the Jewish heritage during the times of Hitler's wrath. At the Concentration camps they were not given the opportunity to maintain a healthy, average diet thus decreasing her body strength. No longer could Kristi hold her chap-stick - alas her frail little fingers slowly released the cylinder shaped tube and hopelessly watched it hit the ground. As it hit the ground, a cloud of dust swept over Kristi's body. At the same time Kristi was taking a big whiff of fresh air (just kidding, the air at concentration camps were not fresh - it reeked of acid) she accidentally inhaled the dirt which fled through her body and made her faint. She woke up and it was a dream, lol.

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- Knock Knock!! - whos there? - KGB - KGB wh........... *slap* - vwe vwill ask the questions!!!!!!! - Knock Knock!! - whos there? - KGB - Mom the KGB is here again....... - i dont care just answer the damn door - 5 seconds later nobody answers the door....... u here a crash and all of a sudden big men run in with guns - one comes over and slaps the mother while he continues to say " the KGB vwill vwait for no one!!!!!" - every body in the house is shot and and the KGB goees on to tlive normal lives........ for the KGB

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he was hit by a bus.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops