Roses are red, violets are blue, I have to go to the bathroom

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anti-joke.ru - russian style

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How do you make a professional wrestler cry? You don't

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chuck norris's daughter lost her virgenatie but he got it back

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curtis campbell has no ear lobes so he bought some milk and drank it with his cereal.

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Guess what? What? Your dog is dead.

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what did the blind, deaf, paraplegic child get for christmas? other than cancer, nothing.

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What worse than stubbing your toe? Getting raped by a panda.

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Life is like a box of chocolates, some are brown, and some are white.

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Why was the fat lady on the Medicine ball? Because she was fat!

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How many NRA members does it take to change a lightbulb? MORE GUNS!

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What's the difference between jelly and jam? I can't jelly my d i c k in your a s s.

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Why did the man have a finger coming out of his ear? He had a birth defect.

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When is a door not a door? When it has yet to be created from its base components.

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Boy, is it hot this summer! How hot is it?! So hot that many people have died as a result!... Drink plenty of water.

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Roses are red, Violets are violet, If you think Violets are blue you're an idiot because they're called violets for a reason.

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A man buys some expensive lingerie for his wife on the occasion of their 10th wedding anniversary. After a lovely candlelight dinner at home, he tells her to close her eyes at which point he retrieves the gift box containing her anniversary present. Thoroughly exited, she rips open the box and takes out the beautiful garment, holding it up to the light in wide-eyed amazement. Her husband gives her a suggestive wink and says "would you like to join me in the bedroom to try it on?" To which she replies, "I AIN'T YER WHORE!"

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69

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Why was a woman crying in a corner of a room She was raped

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There are ten million million million million million million million million million million million sub-atomic particles in the universe that we can observe. Your mamma took the ugly ones and put them into one nerd...

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whats sad about a bus full of blacks driving over a cliff? the driver was white

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A blonde girl walks into a hairdressers and asks for a slight trim. She leaves the hairdressers fairly happy with the result although she was unhappy with the price which she later concluded was most likely because of the rising inflation. However overall she felt it had been a successful outing.

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How many pancakes does it take to shingle a dog house? I don't know considering it was never done before, and that the size of the pancake would have to be taken into account. Although I would suggest you use a better material like wood, plastic, or metal.

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There is a Asian a black guy and a white guy the black guy loves apples the white guy loves pears and the Asian loves Macaroni the white guy gets a apple the black guy gets a pear and the Asian has no lunch so the black guy kills the white guy for the apple and the Asian kills the black guy because he is hungry

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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