Roses are red, Violets are purple not f**cking blue!

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what do you call a black guy under water? A Scuba Diver

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a man was shot.... he died

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall red? Depends on how hard you throw them.

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q:What do you tell a deaf person? a:nothing.

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What's worse than stubbing your toe? Slavery.

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whats more embarissing rhan being raped by a squirel? Being a 40 year old virgin working at mcdonalds

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Hickory dickery dock, two mice ran up the clock. The clock struck 1 and the other got away with minor injuries.

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Whats worse than pulling down a girls pants and seeing a giant furry bush... finding out her vagina has teeth in it.

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I hate it when people dont finish there sen

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Yo mama's so fat, that she died from obesity.

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Why did stevie get stabbed in the jugular by his sister? He was telling bad anti jokes.

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What is the leading cause of death? - Dying.

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Person: hey buddy have you heard the greteat news Freind: yea you have aids Person: no my wife jusr became a pristatue an she had ten patients already i was her first

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Why did the black guy stop his car? There was a stop sign

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A handless Asian boy was riding his bike through the park with some friends. One of his friends puts his arms in the air and yells "Look! No hands!" The handless boy rides his bike home, crying and thinking about how one day he would like to say, "Look! No hands!" without people getting nauseous.

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There is a blond and a burnette in a car. The blonde is driving. What a nice use of the carpool

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I don't know why.

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What did the pet lion say to its owner? Nothing. The lion then proceeded to hunt down its owner, pin him down and rip out his insides. Besides, the likelyhood of owning a lion as a pet is very slim, and even if one did, this act would be highly illegal in most parts of the world.

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Double-whammy

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What kind of ship never sinks? Not the Titanic.

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There is a high speed pursuit when suddenly the suspect's car skids out of control and crashes into a field. Two cows witness the commotion, when one turns round to the other and says "Moo"

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How did the lazy fat boy burn a lot of calories? He set his fat friend of fire.

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Why did the man walk into the wall? He was blind.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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