Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

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Where did the girl go after the explosion? Everywhere

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A black man sits down to have a legal conversation with his state appointed attorney for the first time being arrested. They lawyer advises him to tell him the truth of exactly what happened. He proceeds to do so and is provided with excellent legal advice.

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How did the Mexican cross the border without getting caught? He didn't; he was executed immediately.

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What happens when a chicken with a goat have sex? nothing.

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Woody Allen once said, "I have had many romantic relationships in my life that were both complex and humorous."

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What is worse-losing your phone or failing school? Apartheid

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a naked man walks into a bar the police arrived 10 minutes

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What goes from pink to red in 5 seconds? A pink shirt when red paint is spilled on it.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? Get in the car.

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A baby tastes grapefruit juice for the first time. She is allergic and immediately begins convulsing and dies.

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why did the platypus fall out of a tree it couldnt even climb up the tree

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What do you call it when a black man kills an Asian man? Murder.

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Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

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i like candy and other things that are edible... please dont thumbs down just cuz this suxxx just put thumbs up and santa claus will haunt u :)

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What did the fireman say to the people in the burning house I'm going to use this water for my sprinkler rather than saving your lives. I might as well use this for something more significan, like my lawn.

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Q.Whats the difference between a trampoline and a pile of dead babies? A. I don't were my cleats on my trampoline.

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Do you believe in love at first site? Or should I walk by again?

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A kid walks into a bar. He leaves wasted.

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Jim has five apples. He gives two apples to Joe. What is left? Fruit

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A 16 year old girl went into a bar. The police realized she did not have an ID, and arrested her.

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Your mamas so fat that she went to the doctor and he said she has a very high case of diabetes so now she's trying to excerise more and watching what she eats.

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How about that airline food?

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I found a lump on my right testicle. So, as a precaution I went to my local hospital to have myself checked out. Thankfully, it wasn't accute testicular cancer. Instead I only had to suffer for a few months, but it's getting better now. Sadly, I won't be able to have children and now my semen has a somewhat unsavoury flavour. Thanks for asking.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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