Q: Whats the difference between a trash can full of dead babies, and a porch? A: A porch isnt in my garage.

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5 blondes walk into a bar They all leave very intoxicated and die in a car accident shortly after.

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don't do anything i wouldn't do first

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A duck walks into a bar- nope, just chuck testa...

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What's worse than a worm in your apple That one time I rapped and killed your mom, oh and happy birthday prick

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Yo momma so ugly she looks out the window and got arrested for mooning.

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what did the tree say to the person? nothing trees cant talk

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What do you get when you put a woman in a room with 4 guys? She gets Gang Banged.

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Question: What do you call the black guy wearing a white shirt? Answer: Steve. His parents game him the name at birth, and he is called that ever since.

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Why was the girl unhappy with her male teacher? Because he gave her a bad grade...and raped her the night before.

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read me write me

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Two biscuits were sitting in an oven. One says to the other hows it going, the other says nothing because he knows that biscuits can't talk.

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Why couldn't the married couple have sex? They were lesbians who were saving up a sex change.

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“When life gives you lemons, don’t make lemonade. Make life take the lemons back! Get mad! I don’t want your damn lemons, what the hell am I supposed to do with these? Demand to see life’s manager! Make life rue the day it thought it could give Cave Johnson lemons! Do you know who I am? I’m the man who’s gonna burn your house down! With the lemons! I’m gonna get my engineers to invent a combustible lemon that burns your house down!”

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Roeses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, My Name Is Dave, Microwave

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What do you get when a person and a cat try to have a child of some sort? Nothing because there chromosomes don't match, and there for physically impossible.

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock! Who's there? Not Sarah!

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Q.A zebra somehow managed to get out of the zoo and started running all around the town. After some time he saw a zebra crossing(not an original zebra crossing the road but the black and white stripes)on the road.He stoppped suddenly.WHY? A. He was too tired to run any more!!!

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why did the man go to prison? he was a serial rapist.

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He--Hey guys

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Why did the boy fall of his BMX? Because someone threw a dish-washer at him.

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Why do thieves shower before undertaking a robbery? Probably part of their morning routine.

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Coke or Pepsi? Trick question, beer.

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Why are orphans so bad at baseball? They don't know where home is.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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