Q. what did voldemort get for christmas that harry potter didnt? A. dinner with his parents

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What happened to the boy with cancer? He died.

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why is six afraid of seven? because seven is black

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A duck walks into a bar and asks for a beer. The bartender realizing this is an odd situation, seeing that ducks cannot articulate the English language, realizes he must be dreaming. He wakes up and turns to tell his wife about the dream, but she won't respond. He then realizes how his marriage is in shambles...

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Roses are red, violets are blue I've got Alzheimer's cheese on toast

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What is grosser than somebody eating their own booger? Someone else eating that persons booger

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Q: if it takes a week to walk a fortnight how many pounds of oranges can you fit in a grapegruit. A: None, because there is no bones in ice cream

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-On a scale of one to ten, what's your favourite colour of the alphabet? -The answer is yes, because aliens don't wear hats.

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Jackie Chan: Who the **** is chuck Testa? A: Chuck Testa was an internet sensation who became famous after his video on Youtube advertising his taxidermy business, Ojai Valley Taxidermy.

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Where did Susie go after the explosion? I don't know: she was nowhere near the explosion at the time that it happened. She probably got up to use the bathroom.

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What do you call a cow lying on a barn floor? A cow

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It couldn't handle the stress and pressure of being a duck so it committed suicide by crossing a road and therefor being run over by a car.

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Q:What did the boy do when his girlfriend cheated on him? A:He broke up with her because cheating is wrong and he deserves better.

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How did the mom quiet her screaming baby? She threw it out the window.

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no pen = no studying no studying = bad grades bad grades = no job no job = no money no money = no food no food = death DON'T LOSE YOUR PEN

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A quadriplegic walked into a bar, and... oh, whoops, nevermind.

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Why did the black man go to hospital? To cure his black.

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hat did the fridge say to the oven your hot baby \

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don't just stand there

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knock knock who's there funny funny who a funny joke

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What do you call a black man riding a bike? A hard worker, he saved up his money for weeks trying to buy a bicycle.

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Deja moo: The feeling you've heard this bull before.

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What did Michael Jackson say to the little boys before they came to his house? Get on the ferris wheel

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How do you get Jake snow to shut up? Say shut up

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops