A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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How do you get a black man out of a tree? You provide him with a ladder of varying length depending on his height in the tree and hold the ladder to ensure that it is stable and safe while he is climbing down. If he his very high in the tree then it may be helpful to call the fire department for assistance in getting him down.

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Your momma is so black, that her melanin levels are relatively high.

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Justin Beiber is a good singer

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What do you call Anne Franks life? A big game of hide and go seek.

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What's 1+5 2+4 3+3 4+2 5+1 Whats 6+1 If you said 6 you're stupid.

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A Jew,Spiderman and The Incredible Hulk all jump off the top of the Empire State Building,who hits the ground first? The Jew because the other two dont exist

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http://www.booksie.com/declan_mckimm

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Why did the homeless man decide it was time to get off the streets? He wanted to save face.

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What did one wall say to the other? Nothing. Walls can't talk.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Neither has he.

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Women are only good for two things... Being raped and being raped in the ass.

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What do you call a cold chicken? A Raw Chicken.

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what did batman say to robin to get him into the car? Get in the car

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Q: What's the difference between a Porsche and a pile of dead babies? A: I don't have a Porsche in my garage. But I don't have a pile of dead babies either. So, yeah.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To save his soon to be butchered family.

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My mother always said that jumping in piles of leaves was fun. That was before she died of pancreatic cancer.

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What did Larry do when little Billys baseball crashed through his window? He raped and murdered little Billy for Larry has raped and murdered many children.

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What do you call a black man backfilping off a roof The dark knight

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Whats long, black, and fat? The line at KFC

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from a fat emo girl with a knife

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What did the pirate say when his parrot died? Nothing. He was upset and didn't really feel like talking.

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How do you get four gay guys to sit on one barstool? It's quite difficult, it would be easier to just get 3 more barstools.

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How did the man lose his arm? beacuse of the five year old with a knife obsesion standing right beind you at this minute...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops