stephen hawking walks into a bar...

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Why do dragons shoot fire? I don't know, I'm asking you the question.

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Q. What do you get when you mix eggs, mashed potatoes and salt? A. A pretty good batter for mashed potato pancakes.

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Q: If 0+0=2 and four shampoo bottles is equal to two toaster strudels, how many pizza slices can Samuel eat? A: Winter because grass=6

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Q: what did Timmy get for his 8th birthday A: killed MR

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Why did Jimmy fall off the swing? He had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Certainly not Jimmy.

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Why did the young boy hit the other young boy? Because the other young boy was bullying his friend and he thought it was time he should stand up for himself and take control of the situation.

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What happens when your dog is bad? A crying dog who has to sleep in the BACKYARD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Stupid dog....

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What did batman say to robin before they got in the car? Get in the car!

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How would I re-arrange the alphabet? I would place P in your butt...

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roses are red violets are blue i take pleasure in the simple things in life as i have nothing else left to live for

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra

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A duck walks into a bar and asks for a beer. The bartender realizing this is an odd situation, seeing that ducks cannot articulate the English language, realizes he must be dreaming. He wakes up and turns to tell his wife about the dream, but she won't respond. He then realizes how his marriage is in shambles...

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Q:Why did the Mexican cross the border? A:To come to America to provide for his starving family.

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What's the difference between a black person and cancer? If you don't know already, you should really question your countries education system and your parents upbringing.

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I've been reading these for the past hour and you guys are just out right terrible! -Sarah

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knock knock whos there? nobody

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What's the difference between a pizza and a baby? I don't stab pizza 47 times in the chest with a chainsaw.

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Kirstie Alley is soooo fat! How fat is she? Well, she's so fat that she's in grave danger of developing heart disease, and death

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What gets louder as it gets smaller? A baby in a trash compactor.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He had to get to the other side.

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I'm going to rewrite history. History.

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what do you call a dead man rolling down a hill on fire, being shot in the head, and strapped to a bomb Dead

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What did the fat girl mean when she said, " last night was amaziing?" that pizza pie you shared was very well crafted and baked

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops