Why is my penis 2 inch hard? Because I rape little boys with it and there tight little asshole are crushing it

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What do you call a person who kills there own child? Casey Anthony.

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What's worse than seeing your grandfather dead on the floor? Seeing your grandmother standing over him with a knife

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People with Alzheimers will not remember this joke

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Roses are red. Violets are blue.

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seek beauty

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What do you call cheese that's mine? My cheese

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What did the genie say to the man that rubbed the magic lamp? Nothing, genies don't exist.

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Why did the idiot take a selfie with his phone underwater? Because he's an idiot

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You know what a thief's kid receive on christmas? Your bike!

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what did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? were both lawyer's.

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What's the difference between your dog and your mother? Your dog doesn't think you're a disgrace to the family

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Chuck Norris can get a nuke in Black Ops.

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Why did little Jimmy drop his ice cream ? He got hit by a bus.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? His wife and children had just been struck by a moving vehicle traveling at approximately 45 miles per hour trying to cross the same road. He ran across the road to comfort his dying wife and two children as they took their final breaths. The chicken was also not really a chicken but a middle-aged man who had recently been laid off his job and diagnosed wiuth an incureable disease.

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A muslim gets on an airplane and takes his seat. The plane lands safely and he enjoys his vacation in Florida.

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Why was the cat meowing at the chicken? Because Sally got hit by a fridge.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Tulips can be of multiple colors.

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What is white and flies upwards? A retarded Snowflake.

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Why couldn't the bartender sell alcoholic beverages? He got fired

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Why do chickens have feathers? Because chickens are birds and birds have feathers.

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Why did the man have no friends? He mudered and ate someone in '86 and is rotting in prison.

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Why did Sally fly off the swing, She had no arms Knock knock *Who's there* Not Sally

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Whats worse than 10 babies nailed to one tree 1 baby nailed to 10

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops