why did the owner of Google decide to name the company "Google"? google it..

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She has no arms.

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knock knock. who's there? no one. no one who? no one who?

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How do you kill a blue elephant? Shoot it with a blue elephant gun. How do you kill a pink elephant? Hold it's nose until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

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What kind of pizza did the world trade center order? Two cheese pizzas.

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She likes her sex like she likes her penises. Without a woman.

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* Are you deaf? * Yes, as I love paradoxes.

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A black guy, a jew, and an asian walk into a bar, have a beer each, and then leave, because they have high-paying jobs and don't want to risk getting DUIs.

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A priest, a minister and a rabbi walk into a bar and the bartender says: "Where would you like to sit, gentlemen"?

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What's red and has wheels? A red car

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Why is OK SUK WHANG's name on a gravestone? She thought she was way better than okay.

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Why did the police officer arrest the baseball player? He raped and murdered a thirteen year old girl.

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How many feet are in a yard? It depends how many people are in the yard.

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nicky finds it really hard to get it up.

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Three blind mice go into a pub, but they are unaware of their surroundings so to derive humour from it would be exploitative.

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once there was an anti-joke. it wasn't well thought out or even very creative. what happened to the anti-joke's premise? it got undermined or reversed in the punchline. but the punchline was way too straightforward. so, the whole joke really ended up sucking.

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What did the cake say to the icing? Come here

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks, "Why the long face" To which the horse replies by trampling him to death for making rude remarks about his face.

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A man walks into a bar in the morning. He is the bartender, and he works there.

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Why is Keven's name spelled with an E Because his parents are black.

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What do you say to a black man driving a car? Taxi

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Where did the drunk Mother drive? Back to the Bar because she forgot her Baby.. Except she left it left it on the roof of the car...

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Once upon a time a homeless man was walking down the street. He stopped suddenly and realized he didn't know how to read. So he walked to the library to find someone to teach him. A woman was sitting at one of the tables so the homeless man walked up to her and asked, "Can you teach me how to read?" The woman stared at the homeless man for a few moments. Then she replied to him saying, "Not until you take a bath." Realizing that he smelled awful and that his face was covered in dirt he nodded towards the woman and left to go find a shower house. The homeless man came upon a hotel and asked the receptionist, "Excuse me sir, may I take a shower here?" The receptionist gave the man a long hard look and said, "Not until you find a better set of clothes." The homeless man looked at himself and saw that his clothes were quite old and worn out so he left the hotel to find a clothing store. He finds a clothing store and asks an employee, "Sir, may I have a new shirt, pants, socks, shoes and a pair of underwear?" The employee quickly said in reply, "Not until you pay for them." The homeless man remembered that he indeed was poor and didn't have a penny to his name. So then he walks out of the store to go find a job and make some money. He happens across a storage facility moving many heavy boxes. He walks up to the supervisor and asks, "Pardon me sir, do you need any help with moving these boxes? If you can pay me a few dollars I will help you." The supervisor said to him, "Sure, start moving them to that unit in the corner there. So the homeless man worked until dusk, made $55 dollars, went back to the clothes store, bought new clothes, waked back to the hotel and took a shower, and finally walked over to the library where the woman was still sitting and learned how to read. He walked out of the library feeling accomplished and full of pride. Unfortunately he wasn't paying attention to where he was walking. He slipped on the curb into traffic and was hit by a car, dying on impact.

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Have you seen Helen Keller's new car? Neither has Stevie Wonder.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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