Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson are camping out. After they set up their tent and get inside to go to sleep, they look up at the stars. Holmes asks Watson to make a deduction. "Well, Holmes, I think it's highly probable that other planets outside our own, among those many stars up there, could have sentient life." Holmes points up and says, "Someone stole our tent, you idiot."

thumb_up thumb_down -33

What happened to the man who fell off a cliff? He fell

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Two men are talking: Bob: "Do you like fishsticks?" Joe: "Yes I do." Bob: "Your a gay fish."

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

why was the little girl crying? Because her family was dead

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Q-What do you call a dog with no legs? A-Nothing because he cant come over to you anyway..

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Q: Whats the difference between a lamborghini and a pile of dead babies? A: I don't have a lamborghini in my garage.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Wow, that is one of the things I would think I would react all bad to, but that`s, a strangely attractive quality in you.

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Oh, no! There is a ginger jew within 2 meters of me!

thumb_up thumb_down -33

I need a way to meet local babes and get ripped in 4 weeks. Shame there aren't any popularly advertised methods of doing that around here...

thumb_up thumb_down -33

Roses are red. They also have thorns. Their family is Rosaceae and they are often given as gifts between lovers. They grow in well drained and fertile soils...

thumb_up thumb_down -33

What's worse than getting no up-votes on an anti-joke? Getting down votes

thumb_up thumb_down -33

what did katness save her Life? because peter hates her and katness is peaches and peter dies in the titanic because it is gay shut up becky

thumb_up thumb_down -33

how many babies does it take to paint a wall? it depends on how hard you throw 'em.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

why did the chicken stop in the middle of crossing the road? to get to the other side

thumb_up thumb_down -35

What did the black kid get for christmas? Probably nothing as the social economy of the black race has been low in 2011 and hasn't raised by a penny in 2012.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Vote this up or I'll tell my mum!

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Q: If two lesbians are in a relationship, who makes the sandwiches? A: They both do.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Do you want to hear a racist joke? I hate black people...

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Q: Why are the Black Eyed Peas named the Black Eyed Peas? A: I don't know ask them yourself.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Hey! That's mine! Give it back!

thumb_up thumb_down -35

A 16 year old boy and girl have unprotected sex. The girl becomes pregnant and decides to keep the baby. They both drop out of high school, get lots of government cheese, and the boy holds a steady job as manager at the local mcdonalds for the rest of his life.

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Kittens are orange, puppies are grey, and they both make good pets

thumb_up thumb_down -35

how do goldfishes drown? you pull them backward water fills there lung and there die

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops