What did one liar say to the other liar? I'm very honest.

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Three men stumble upon an ancient lamp in the desert. They sell it to a museum and split the profits evenly.

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Four blondes began their road trip from NYC to Europe and promptly drowned.

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what does a jet and plane have in common? the letter "e"

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A man walks into a store with a faulty washing machine. He provides a valid guarantee receipt at the customer service desk and it is replaced without an issue

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What fires shots? A gun

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Knock Knock "Who's there?" "This is Frank from Walside Windows just wondering if you wou..." (Door Slams Shut) "Damn those people are annoying"..

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Why did the turtle cross the road? Because there was a chicken stapled to his face.

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what's gray, red, and goes over a 100 mph? a toad in a blender

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hi bros hahahhah like it up, ah ma gkenny

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a man walks into a bar and buys a drink

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why did the chicken cross the road because on the other side his wife that he had loved for years was being tortured and he was trying to save her life.

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yo mommas so poor she doesn't live in a house

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Doctor! doctor! I feel like a bridge! That's the least of your problems you've got cancer by ndc

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Doctor Doctor I think I'm a dog. Sit down on the couch and tell me about it. Ok.

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Q: What is usually black , is a rectangle and has two circles? A: An i pod touch 4

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why did the man commit scuicide because he was depressed

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What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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What's the difference between a blonde and a bowling ball? A blonde is a human woman and a bowling ball is an inanimate object used for the popular sport of bowling.

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Person 1. Knock-knock. Person 2. Who's there? Person 1. The doctor. Person 2. The doct-- Person 1. You have cancer and have about three weeks to live.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a bar of soap? You don't rub your balls with a Jew.

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http://media.photobucket.com/image/whale%20penis/marcus1v0/whale_penis2.jpg

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My Texting Convos: "Heyy!" "Hi!" "Watz up?" "nm hbu?" "Same here!" "Koolio!(: So wrud?" "Nothing. Just texting you!" "Yea! Same! I'm so bored! And tired!" "Ikr!" "Yupp!" *No one answers. When this is what you really want: "I love you soooo much!" "Awwwwh!<3 I loe you too!" "Do you wanna go out?(;" "YES!!(:" "ily<3" "iyl2<3" *convo goes on forever(: Moral: Purple tomatoes are books of yellow buttons on hands(;

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how do you make an idiot laugh? tell him a joke from antijoke

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops