why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible to try out for his school's football team. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

A monkey walks into a bar. Monkeys are always funny.

What's worse than being in the Holocaust? Dying in the Holocaust.

A snail buys a car from a dealership, and then asks the manager if he could paint a large S on the side of the car. The manager agrees, and the snail drives away. From the parking lot, the manager sees the car go straight on to the highway and get hit by a truck. Unfortunately, snails cannot drive.

A baby seal walks into a club.

"What's funnier then this joke? Women's rights." *Your suggestion is contradictory considering the fact that you are implying "Women's rights" is more humorous than "Women's rights".

What happened to the woman who walked down a dark alley way? She found a lolly.

What´s Green and turns Red at your Finger Tips? Frog in a Blender.

What's worse than spending time with Inlaws? Spending time with outlaws.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple, finding two worms in your apple. Whats worse than finding two worms in your apple, the Holocaust. Whats worse than the Holocaust, finding three worms in your apple.

Q: What did the black man say to the sheriff? A: Good day, officer

Your mother is so fat that I would call her quite fat indeed.

Why did the princess kiss the frog? She really wanted a wart.

why did the chicken cross the road ? how else is he going to get to the other side

How do you drown a blonde? Put a scratch and sniff sticker at the bottom of the pool then don't let her come up for air.

An American, a German, and a Mexican walk quickly into a room. They were late for a work meeting.

A guy walks into a bar and orders a glass of water. A few seconds later he drinks the water.

The little girl asks her father "Daddy why is santa fat?" "you have to exist to lose weight" he answered

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding an apple-sized tumor in your colon.

Why did the man turn up at his friend's funeral dressed as Mickey Mouse? Because it would have been disrespectful not to attend.

There was a asian jew and a black man standing at a bus stop wht do you call the Freinds

A man walked into a bar making it immediately apparent that he had no future in competitive limbo.

Because the tractor hadn't seen the chicken.

What is blue and has wheels? A disabled Smurf!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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