Know what's funny? Not these jokes!

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What do you call an asian women running for president? A candidate.

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question: why did the dog whine? answer: Because it wanted the freakin bone

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How many types of pure breed dogs are there in the world? 701

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What happend to the girl in the corner? Idk that's why I asked!! :P

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Why did the cow cross the road? The slaughter yard was on the other side!

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What happened to the woman driver who drove to Tesco? Due to the pleasant traffic conditions, she arrived slightly earlier than expected and she finished her weekly shop in forty minutes. She returned home, once again in good traffic and ate a delicious lunch of sausages and chips.

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A man sits down to dinner with his wife And she notifies him that their 8 year old son just died

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Where does Mario go after you finish the game? Drug rehab.

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Why are tootsie rolls brown? because they are....

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What was wrong with the man watching a black and white television program? He wasn't watching a black and white television program at all-he actually had color blindness.

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What's worse then having gum stuck on the bottom of your shoe? Having a stick poked in your eye. What's worse then having a stick poked in your eye? Having a nail go through your foot. What's worse then having a nail go through your foot? Having a stick poked in your eye and a nail going through your foot.

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Q: How do you confuse a blonde. A: Put her in a circular room and tell her to pee in the corner. Q: How does a blonde confuse you? A: She says she's done.

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Whais red and bad for your teeth? a brick

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-Knock Knock - Who's there? - Child Protective Services, we have multiple reports of you abusing several of your children...

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what do you call a blonde skeleton in the closet? last years hide and go seek champion

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Why did Susie fall off the swingset? Because she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

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*knock knock* "Who's there?" "It's the police, I'm afraid your husband was in a car crash and died."

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Where did the paralytic go for a vacation? No where he can't move.

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Q: What's worse than not having a good relationship? A: Starving Africans

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TRICERATOPS!

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How come Pluto and Goofy are both dogs, but Goofy can talk and Pluto can't? Because Goofy can walk on two legs, and is therefore superior to Pluto in Walt Disney's eyes.

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Three guys, stranded on a desert island, find a magic lantern containing a genie, who grants them each one wish. The first guy wishes he was off the island and back home. The second guy wishes the same. The third guy wishes the same.

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Why did the white woman press charges against the black guy? Because he raped her

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops