how many drunk drivers does it take to drive home one and only one, if more than one drunk driver tried to drive home at the same time in the same car they would surely crash and not make it home.

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Why is minecraft so awesome? Because real life is boring as crap.

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what did the one girl say to the other girl? i like your shoes.

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An Englishman, a Scotsman and an Irishman walk into a bar. They have some pints then leave to do their respective tasks for the day.

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Boy: Did it hurt? Girl: (sigh) Did what hurt? Boy: When you broke through the Earth's crust emerging from hell.

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A kid walks into a bar He gets kicked out

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A 14 year old boy's mother walks into his room whilst he is naked. The boy requests for his mother to leave; so she apologizes and leaves as the whole incident was rather embarrasing.

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How many holes can you poke in my chest, When my chest is by far the best If you believe you can stab Then then grab a knife...that you can grab Skewer my breast Which lies on the best chest And you will discover A man under your covers Yes, keep on pokin' Poke my chest with the knife you are strokin' And then swallow a chode because you are stupid.

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Q: How do you find the population of Mexico? A: Take a census

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What do an asian, a black man, and a Mexican all have in common? They all belong minorites that at one time have been outcast by society

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How do u get a dog to sit? Teach it to sit then tell it to sit.

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A horse walks into a bar, Bartender says why the long face? and the horse says, i have horse aids

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Why did Elmo get depressed? All his friends sacrifised themselves to satan

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Knock Knock Whos there Boo OWWW YOU ASS WAT THE F*%^ (crying)

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Charlie Sheen is winning

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Why didn't the boy get a bike for christmas? He broke the bath tub.

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A giraffe walks into a bar and the bar tender asks "Why the long face?!" to witch he replied " I've just been mugged outside.".

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A mother with a bum hip and her son go to walk up a set of stairs in the mall. The floor was slippery because the janitor just mopped the floor. They decide to take the elevator instead.

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what did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? cancer

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread

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Why was Timmy strong? Because his dad injected steroids through his asshole.

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Your mom is so fat, I do not see how she can possibly wipe effectively.

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What is the biggest lie in the entire universe? " I have read and agree to the Terms of Service"

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Why the did black man climb the ladder? To get on the roof of the building to install a satellite dish.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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