What do you get when you cross a Zebra with a Sheep? Hounded by a religious group for playing God.

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So the man goes to the doctor and the doctor tells the man " you will have to quit masturbating " So the man asks " why" And the doctor said " so I can examine you "

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How do you get rid of black people in your back yard? Politely ask them to leave.

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Romeo and Juliet both die at the end of the book. HAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHHAAHA i just screwed you guys over.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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What do you call a guy with no legs and no arms? Mat.

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what did the man say to his wife? I love you

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What do you call a black man doing his taxes? A well respected member of society

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Which does does the Mississippi River flow in? Liquid.

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your mom is so fat, she uses nutrisystem and other weight-loss systems to try to loose weight.

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A family walks into a talent agency. It's a father, mother, son, daughter and dog. The father says to the talent agent, "We have a really amazing act. You should represent us." The agent says, "Sorry, I don't represent family acts. They're a little too cute." The mother says, "Sir, if you just see our act, we know you would want to represent us." The agent says, "OK. OK. I'll take a look." The father begins by juggling some balls. The mother pulls out her harmonica and begins playing "Dixie". The children and dog try and get the dog to jump through a hoop. For the longest time, the agent just sits in silence. Finally, he manages, "That's a hell of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "The Aristocrats!"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, seeing as the slaughterhouse was directly across the road from the farm where the chicken lived, the man who owned the farm led his flock of chickens across the street when they were of age and fattened up so that they could be inhumanly massacred in order to process an order of chicken nuggets.

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Knock knock. Who's there?

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Q: What did Peter say after a long day of work when he got home? A: Nothing, in fact he has job, home, family, or anyone to help him. His leg is pinned down by a large piece of metal that fell on him while looking for food to eat at a construction site, expect him to die of bleeding in the next 24 hours.

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What is a black man's favorite food? It differs from person to person.

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Q: Why didn't Jane cross the road? A: Because Jane is a figment of my imagination and therefore has neither the physical capability to cross this so called "road" nor the initiatory motivation to do so...

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he saw some pandas spooning.

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a guy walks into a bar. he suffered a severe concussion. BECAUSE THE BAR A POLE

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Hey I just met you, And this is crazy But I just kissed you... And I have rabies!

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roses are red, violets are blue, I have schizophrenia, which is a serious mental disorder in which I have difficulty properly experiencing reality. It should not be confused with multiple personality disorder, which is a completely different disease with different symptoms.

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An slutty attractive secretary went into her boss' office He killed her.

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What did the lady say after she returned home from the grocery store? "Oh no! I forgot the milk!"

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What did the pear say to the apple? Fred, you delusions are getting worse and i'm getting a divorce.

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yo mama is so fat she has more rolls than basken robins does flavors

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops