An artist walks into a bar and orders a rum and ckoe. The bartender reads the first sentence and realizes the artist is dyslexic and fixes him a rum and coke.

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why did victor have a tube on his neck he was helping james with security

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Q: how do you get a live elephant into a refrigerator? A: you buy an industrial sized refrigerator from cost-co and then walk the elephant slowly but surely through the door. Q: how do you get a giraffe in a refrigerator? A: after removing the elephant by means of walking out the door, slice the giraffe into small pieces approx. 1m by 1m by 1m and put those into the refrigerator

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knock knock knocking on heavens douoor

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Doctor Doctor! I think im turning into a carrot! Thats a side effect of the drugs Alice, We've just had your test results back. I'm sorry Alice, You've got HIV.

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If little Timmy buys 80 candy bars and eats 67, how many candy bars does he have left? Diabetes. Timmy has diabetes. So he was disowned.

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When is a great time to eat chicken fingers? Never Chickens dont have fingers therefore making it misnamed and impossible to eat them

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Why does Snoop Dog carry an umbrella? For rain.

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What's black and white and red all over? A penguin that just got shot

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? For no specific reason, Chickens don't think much.

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What is the best time to go to the dentist? When you have a toothache

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why did the chicken cross the road ...WHO FREAKING CARES!!!!

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What do you get when you cross a rabbit and a pair of scissors? Nothing. That's not possible with current technology.

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Q. Why are most jews unemployed? A. They all got fired.

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Why didn't the boy cross the street? He didn't have legs

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Two men fought over a bag of peanuts. The peanuts won.

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What did jimmy say when his brother had been mean to him all day and he was about to get a straw and his brother took the last one? That was the last straw!

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This is a stupid joke. Get it to the top of the list and Kobe Bryant will pass to you.

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Whats the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One is fun to smash with a hammer. The other is a watermelon.

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Why Do cats purr when you pet them? I'm actually asking a question there I don't know why.

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Roses are Red, Vilots are blue Im going to kill myself Bye

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chuck norris will never have a heart attack because he has great cardiovascular health.

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A man walks into the doctor's office and says "Doc, I've been having the strangest dreams First I'm a tee pee, Then I'm a wigwam, a tee pee, a wigwam, a tee pee, a wigwam! What could be wrong with me?" The doctor looks at the man and says, "You have aids."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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