What's brown and sticky? A stick.

Knock knock. Who's there? Justin. Hello Justin, please come in.

What is a holocaust victim's favorite food? Nothing.

What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? Neil Armstrong walked on the moon and Michael Jackson appeared in court several times under charges of child molestation

What did the penguin wearing a blue sweater say to the sink? I am a penguin wearing a blue sweater.

A man was about to be assassinated. The assassin said "do you have any last wishes? The man said he wished that a meteor would fly down and kill the assassin. A meteor actually did come down but that was predicted years back. The meteor fell on the assassin and killed him, the man, and any living thing aboveground on Earth.

why did the baby start crying? because he was very hungry and hadn't been feed all day

Writing is hard Poems are strong I am muslim And this is a bomb.

What do you do when you see a black man getting hitted by a Mexican taxi? -Call 911

what do you call two arabs flying a plane? a pilot and a co-pilot

What's brown and sticky? ...A stick.

what do mexicans cross? whatever they want. but in this case their local grocery store parking lot to buy fresh produce.

roses are red violets are blue i've got alzheimer's ...

What do you call a guy with no arms or legs laying on your driveway? You call him by his name

" Want to hear a good anti-joke?! " " Sure! " " Me too. "

Tony Soprano walks into a diner

What's the difference between and orange? The horse wasn't wearing a saddle.

A: Did you know Helen Keller had a treehouse? B: No. A: Neither did she.

A gorilla walks into a bar and gets a banana martini. The bartender thinks that this is peculiar, and then he realizes he is dreaming. He wakes up and tells his wife about this ridiculous dream that he had. His wife ignores him, and the man rolls over and begins to sob because he realizes that his marriage is in shambles.

John walked up to his dad one morning and shouted, "Dad, it's my birthday!" Dad said, "Cool, how old are you?" John says, "I'm seven!" Dad tells him to go downstairs and tell his grandpa. John runs down and says, "Grandpa, it's my birthday, guess how old I am!" Grandpa sticks his hand in John's pants and sticks his thumb into his anus. As he pulls his hand out, he pinches his penis. Grandpa says, "You're seven." John says, "How did you know?" Grandpa says, "I heard you tell your dad upstairs."

why was the boy sad because he had a cat stapled to his face

What's long hard and full of seman. A submarine.

What is a taco made out of? A. Various ingredients ranging from cheese to sour cream.

What does a black man and a monkey have in common? Until February 3rd 1870 neither could vote in America. Monkeys still can't. 

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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