Why is cancer a big thing? -It has grown after the diagnoses

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Guy 1: What is long, hard and full of semen? Guy 2: A submarine. Guy 1: No, my penis.

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The Blonde Gets 100 % On Her Math Test

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Whats wrong Nero? What happened? Please pick up the phone, I am trying to call you, but it just goes from dialing to changing tunes, please do not be upset with me, what did I do wrong? I thought we had an understanding, please just pick up the phone, if you already have my number and all you got nothing to lose...

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What ryhmes with turtle? räpe

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Who found Anne Frank? The Nazis

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How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

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Why did the crossing guard drop his whistle? Because a kid got hit by a passing elephant.

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Q: Why did the dog bark? A: it cant talk.

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What did the traffic light say to the car? dont look at me am changing.

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http://www.com/

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What's brown and sticky? Poop.

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Why does the Taliban forbid people from having sex standing up? It might lead to dancing. And then, of course, death.

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What happened to the man who poo'd too much? He started to eat less because his bowell movements started to cause him serious pain.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Which is rather deceiving, Considering that the name 'violet' should naturally insinuate that the object it is describing is violet as well. Violet as a color is generally a deep shade of purple. Therefore, shouldn't the aforementioned plant, the 'violet', be violet in color as opposed to the blue color that is most widely accepted by the general populous?

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How do you have se with hellen keller? Very sweetly

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Why did the man buy his wife expensive flowers? It was their anniversary and he is a faithful husband.

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What's the best thing for a hangover? Heavy drinking the night before.

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How do you torture helen keller? Waterboard her.

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What do you call Morgan Freeman at a family reunion? Morgan Freeman.

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Why did the Chicken become a medium? To talk to the other side.

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I saw a stray dog the other day So I petted it and got on my way.

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Daisies are green, poppies are white, I have a headache.

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What is fat and white? A polar bear with a glandular problem.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops