How many Poles does it take to change a lightbulb? Just the one, usually.

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What's the difference between a piano and a goldfish? One's a piano, the other is a goldfish.

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An itsy bitsy spider went up the water spout Down came my dick, and forced the spider out

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Obama stumbles upon a KKK meeting. All the klansmen shake his hand and respect him because he is the President.

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mexicans fishing

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Knock Knock Who's there Boo Boo who Boo I'm a ghost atleast act scared

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What do you call a mother cow? Moooom

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Why is the ground wet It rained

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Q. Where did Little Timmy go for Christmas? A. Auschwitz

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What's your blood type? Red.

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what do call a purple animal that eats rocks? A purple rock eater..

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Did you know Helen Keller had a tree house? Niether did she

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What's another name for asexual reproduction? Parthenogenesis.

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a man walks in to a bar. he says oww.

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Verbal assault; because battering someone to death with a dictionary has never been so much fun. [L]

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Why did Anti-Joke.com close down? It didn't. If your reading this, the site is fully operational and up to date with your system.

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Whats worse than getting shot in the foot? Watching each member of your family get shot in the foot.

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While i was driving, my son asked, 'Have you had an accident in the last 5 years Dad?' And I replied, 'You're almost four now son'.

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How do u get a baby to stop crawling in circles? Nail its other hand to the floor

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Why was Jacob not allowed to play sports? He fell down in the middle off the street and got ran over 50 times and could never do anything again.

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hi

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Q: Why did the man have aids? A: He had unprotected sex with a man who had aids.

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If I could slow down time I would have become a super criminal or something, no, my movements become slower also, ever heard of a game Max Payne? The character can slow down his perception of time and still aim his gun normally while he himself moving at the same speed as the rest. I well... when time seems to go slower, my thoughts do not, so yeaaah, Except my fast reactions also make me wear myself out faster to the point where I got injured a lot as a kid, like smacking my wrist against arcade games and stuff, broke my wrist, as a teen, still hurts when it rains, yeah weird but true.

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So I was standing in line at the grocery store and this little old lady let me cut in front of her. It was neat.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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