Your momma is so stupid your momma forgot that jesus did exist and has been proven by historians to have existed

Justin Bieber

What is striped black and white? A prisoner in jail arrested for the murder and rape of a 7 year old child.

Woman + Kitchen = sandwich

Why did the chicken cross the road? You reading another one of these again?

A human walked into a bar, The bartender quacked, "quack quack quack" The human wondered why all the patrons and the bartender were ducks, so he left the bar, before his head spontaneously exploded.

Hey, did you hear about the guy who got his left arm and left leg cut off? Yeah, it was pretty brutal. His right arm and right leg got cut off, too.

Yo momma so fat she's obese.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm.

goats are like mushrooms, if you shoot a duck, im scared of toasters

Stare at the person nearest to you and say "sprinkles" with the straightest face possible.

Why did the mailman say hi to you? He was trying to be friendly

Boy: Will you go out with me? Girl: No. Boy: Why? Girl: Because I don't want to.

How did the black kid apply for college? The Common App. Duhh

there was this kid who was perfectly well-adjusted, had most normal things a person needs and a generally good life. what did he get for Christmas. non-hodgkins lymphoma.

Why did Susie fall off the swing?? ShE had no arms. Knock knock... Whose there? Not Susie

Q: Why did the clown fall off the swing? A: He got hit by an axe.

A guy walks into a bar, orders a drink, and nothing interesting happens.

A black man, a Mexican man, and a cop are walking in downtown New York. So are tens of thousands of other people, because it is a very large and diverse city.

What happened to Kanye West when he interrupted a KKK ritual meeting? He was promptly hung from a tree for being a negro.

My Japanese girlfriend dumped me today...Oh well, theres plenty more in the sea

Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

MR MC CANN WHATS THE ANSWER

How do you call a half deaf duck? HEY DUCK!!!!!!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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