Roses are red Violets are blue I like pussy Because it feels really good when I stick my penis inside her vaginal opening

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Why does it get hot after a basketball game? Because of the crowd all breathing out carbon dioxide and the high level of activity generating excess body heat.

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Why did the girl fall out of the tree? Because she had no arms

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Why did the man die after getting his picture taken The camera was a gun

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Rebecca Blacks walk into a bar. She gets shot.

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Knock Knock Who's there? re-posession officers

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person 1: don't look person 2:Why person 1:because my shirt not on and my boobs are jiggiling

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Teacher: Why didn't you do your homework? Student: My friends told me not to. Teacher: So if your friends tell you to go jump off a bridge, would you do it? Student: Well, it all depends on if I land on a fat kid. Like Chubb. Chubb: Yeah, I know, my eating habit, i-i-its a big problem. -Payden R.

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Why does Miley Cyrus make sex tapes It's the only acting job she can get

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Why doesn't Susie have a bike? She has no arms. Who pushed Johnny off a cliff? Definitely not Susie.

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Yeah your point? Anyway, so then the brain surgeon goes: I have have cut into thousands of brains, and never seen a single thought.

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Fine, start by proving to me that you can be a reasonable human being, and I will meet you myself, I have too many of those that rely on my guidance and protection in order for me to send myself off to some suicide mission. Say, are you familiar with the Antony Stark method?

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why couldn't the blonde change the lightbulb? she couldn't find the leperchaun at the end of the rainbow

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what did batman say to robyn before he got in the car?... "get in the car"

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Fiona: SHREK! WHERE WERE YOU TONIGHT? Shrek: Out clubbing with the boys. Fiona: What did you do. Shrek: Eat Jews. Borat: iz vedy naaace

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Q: What say one therapist to a friend? A: I'm the rapist

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Man walks into an apple store. Shortly after he leaves with a fully charged phone.

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Ben Wuz here was the funniest Hahahahaha

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how many dead babies can fit in a microwave? 3 1/2

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How do you drown a blonde? Weigh her down and throw her into a body of water.

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What do men like most of all? Let's not lie, BOOBIES!

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Why did the jew cross the road Because he was being cornered by 10 nazis that had automatic guns

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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A kid walks in to a bar. The bartender asks the boy where his parents are and he replies that he does not know. They call the police who proceed to try to contact the boy's parents. They have gone missing so the boy must go up for adoption. He gets adopted by an abusive family and runs away. Without a family, job, or money, he could not afford a house. He lived alone in a box until he died of starvation.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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