whts worse than finding a worm in your apple? butt sex with the devil

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What do Lebron James and Bill Murray have in common? They are both black basketball players. Except for bill murray

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What do you get when you cross a dog and a cat? A hybrid animal that can never exist to do each species own genetic make-up which would subsequently reject the other's. I.E. The cat would reject the dog sperm from ever fertilizing and the dog would reject cat sperm.

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whats black and goes to newy high Manyiel

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What do you call a blonde in a library? Lost

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra drinks a bear and leafs .....

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Why does Tim Teblow love men? Logan Cole told him to.

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Why did the little boy cry? Because he stuck his finger into a blender

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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Why would Bill Clinton like Jess so much? Cause he has a vagina, smells like shit, and has cankles.

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why did jimmy loose the bike race. because he never entered.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was Tuesday!

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Roses are red, Violets are violet.

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Q. What's worst than getting kicked in the balls ? A. The holacaust

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Why was Jimmy sad? Because he was about to be shot for attempting to assassinate the president.

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When life throws you lemons, duck.

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Why did the boy fall of his BMX? Because someone threw a dish-washer at him.

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what the difference between a dog and a blue whale? im going to burn your house down

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What does a fish and a truck have in common? Nothing. One is a fish & one is a truck.

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Why did the girl fall out of the swing? She had no arms.

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Duck: got any grapes? Lemonade Seller: no the duck waddeld away and never came back for the guy has no grapes

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your mum

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What do you call a Harry Beaver? A beaver with lots of hair.

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A man is on an operating table. His heart stops beating and he suddenly finds himself at the Gates of Heaven. St. Peter approaches him. "Welcome, my son," St. Peter says. "I can't believe it," the man exclaims, "I've died and gone to Heaven! I-" St. Peter interrupts him. "Not quite yet, my son. You must first answer three questions. You will only enter Heaven if I deem you fit to do so." The man nervously agrees. "All right. First question," St. Peter says. "Did you ever commit a sin and never sought forgiveness?" The man thinks long and hard. "No, I always made sure to apologize." "Splendid," St. Peter responds. "Did you attend church every Sunday?" The man loses some of his former confidence. "I may have missed the odd week." "That's fine," says St. Peter. "One last question... Do you believe you are worthy of entering the Gates of Heaven?" The man answers nervously, "Well... yes, yes I do." St. Peter smiles. "Congratulations, my son. You have passed the test, and may enter Heaven!" The man is ecstatic as the pearly gates open up for him. He enters Heaven and is astounded by its magnificent beauty. The man then loses all brain function and dies on the operating table.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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