How do you make Bill Gates poor? You take all of his money

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How did leatherface cut a tree when he lost his chainsaw? He just asked a friendly neighbor to borrow him a axe

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there was a little girl walking through a park. then she was kidnapped and most likely raped and sold to a foreign country.

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An atmosphere goes into one bar. Which is pretty normal since it is roughly the regular value of the atmospheric pressure on Earth at sea level

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How much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? Probably 5

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I put the word **** in a post. Anti Joke starred it and the joke didn't make sense anymore.

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What do black people do with M&Ms? They eat them.

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What's the difference between the Hulk and the Thing? One's green.

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A Muslim walks into a bomb shop. Unfortunately for the bomb shop owner, the Muslim was a police officer. He proceeded to arrest the owner and the employees of the store, as it turned out that the selling of these particular explosive devices were illegal. They ended up in jail, and justice was served.

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Why did Justin Beiber cut his hair It had grown to long

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Roses are red, violets are blue, some poems rhyme, others don't

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How do you get your dog to stop peeing on the floor? SHOOT IT!!!

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Haiku's are easy But sometimes they don't make sense Refrigerator

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Why did little Tommy eat an apple? Because he was on a diet

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What did Kony say to the children right before he took them Come with me you f******* n*****

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who lives a pineapple under the sea? a proper spazztwat.

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a gay guy is in a club, from across the room he sees another attractive man with now shirt and he gets an erection.

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Why is the black man in the ghetto? He is a cop and is trying to solve a murder that was committed a couple days ago.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I've tested positive for herpes We probably shouldn't have intercourse

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How do you punish Helen Keller? Sit her in the corner and deprive her of things she likes to do.

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What is brown and salty? A pretzel.

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why is the spine-tailed swift the fastest bird? because its faster than the second fastest bird.

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Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it thought it was a game. Why did the tree fall over? Because it thought it was a squirrel.

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How do you make an egg laugh? You can't. Eggs are inanimate objects which are incapable of emotion, thus laughter.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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