do you know what happened to the bravest warrior in the battle who got stabbed in the foot while trying to rescue puppies from a burning building and dying children? well he took the children and puppies home, and ate them. then the SWAT came in and killed him. so yeah... oh... suck my a s s barf

When life gives you lemons You've got some lemons.

Three soldiers, one Japanese, one American, and one Italian were stuck in a desert. How did they escape? A rescue squad of thirty trained troops came down in a helicopter and brought them each to their respective homes except the Italian who was actually a M.afia boss so they put him in prison.

I used to be addicted to soap, but now I'm clean. I'm still addicted to heroin, though. No chance I'm ever giving that up.

Whats worse than a dumpster full of dead babies? A landfill full of dead babies.

What's white and red all over? A white guy who walked in the ghetto.

yo mamma's so fat she's fat!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

A boy with red hair is happy.

What did boy with now arms and no legs get for christmas A pogo-stick

What did the boy with four arms get for Christmas? A Laptop. Why couldn't he use it? He had no fingers.

A man walked into a bar. He bought a pint.

Want to hear a joke? Women's rights.

Why did John break down in tears? Because he was molested as a child.

Why did steve cry? Because he got punched.

A handless Asian boy was riding his bike through the park with some friends. One of his friends puts his arms in the air and yells "Look! No hands!" The handless boy rides his bike home, crying and thinking about how one day he would like to say, "Look! No hands!" without people getting nauseous.

what types of people have big noses? people whose parents both carried the recesive gene.

A priest and rabbi walk into a bar. The bartender was incredibly biased towards religion and had the rabbi removed.

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Why was 6 afraid of seven? seven commited statitory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8, murdered nine, was sent to jail for life, let out early for community service, and told 6 he was coming forhim 6 months later.... 6 commited suicide by jumping off a cliff his body was never found his family didnt get to say good bye thats why 6 is afraid of 7

Knock Knock! Who's there? No one. No one is ever going to be there for you. Also, you're adopted.

Whats worse tan finding a worm in your apple? Being touched by Michael Jackson

HOW TO RE-AD : FOR DUMMIES. (HELLEN KELLER ADDITION)

What do you call a black pilot? A pilot, you racist.

Hey Shea

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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