Yo mama's so fat she needed a toilet that had a bigger seat (just like me)

What's worse than having a gay friend? 9/11.

What's weird about four black men in a toilet? No one got shot.

Hey babe, do you like video games, movies, mystery books, philosophy, walking in the park, going to the gym, riding bicycles, traveling around the world, and meeting new people? Because I like video games, movies, mystery books, philosophy, walking in the park, going to the gym, riding bicycles, traveling around the world, and meeting new people.

How do you drown a dumb blonde? Hold her underwater.

Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

why do elephants paint them selves green ..... to blend into snooker tables. have u ever seen an elephant on a snooker table .... thats just how good they are.

Why didn't Sarah come to school today? She had a heart attack and died.

Two muffins are in an oven. They say nothing, muffins are inanimate objects and therefore cannot talk.

Y didnt the grandma go to christmas? She died on thanksgiving

Beethoven! It is true? Did you really lose your hearing? Yes.

What happens to an elephant when it rains? It gets wet.

Facilitator huh? Sounds like someone that kills someone standing in the way, or bribes off others.

What's even better than finding 10 bucks in your pocket? Getting into heaven.

Knock knock Who's there A girl scout A girl scout who? A girl scout trying to sell cookies to support her alcoholic parents who beat her

What would Muhammed do?

Q: How do you make a five year cry twice? A: There are many ways, as children are generally not that adept at controlling their emotions. Loud noises, threats of violence, images of scary monsters... those tend to work. Be sure to let them stop crying before making them cry again, otherwise you will have only made them cry once.

why cant the kid find any friends? he was stranded in a desert.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was the only way to get across

You can teach a man to fish but you cant teach a fish to man

DEAD ON KANE ITS BEEN ALL YOU ABD CAOIMHIN

How do you kill a black man There is many ways

Q. Why do televisions come with clickers A. So you don't have to get up to change the channel

Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...