Why was timmy no longer being bullied at school? The rope said it all! Bitch Died HA

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why did my BFF hate me?i called her an idiot on all the holidays including her birthday

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Guess what? What? You guessed correctly.

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Knock knock. Man: Who's there? Hooker: The hooker you called for. Man: Oh, dear lord. My wife hasn't left yet. I need you to come back in fifteen minutes. Wife: Honey, who is it? Man: The hooker I called for, but you haven't left yet. I told her to come back in fifteen minutes

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I'm dressing up as a shia for halloween

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Q. Why did the squirrel cross the road? A. Because it was stapled to the chicken.

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A duck walks in wal-mart and buys stuff. The cashier ask how hes going to pay and the duck said just put it on my bill.

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PS3 has the exerrent technorogy and finersse to make excerrent gaming such as... ...ITS RIDGE RACER! RIIIIIIIIIDGE RACEEEEEEEEEEEER!

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how does an Arab scare someone He does a countdown

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Q: What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferari? A: I don't have a ferari in my garage.

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Why did the black guy punch the white guy? They were both professional boxers.

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why was the girl raped? she left the kitchen.

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what do you give a little girl with no arms no legs and who lives in a orfanidge for christmas?.................................... nothing because no parent wants a freak kid

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jim davidson , nick griffin , and bernard manning walk into a bar , and order a bitter, a lager, and a stout respectfully

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Chuck Norris has appeared in several action films.

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Why was the black man crying? His wife left him, took his children, and most of his possessions in the divorce.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Its the pizza man. Get your yellow no good keister off my property before I pump your guts full of lead. 1,2...10

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, My name's Dave, Microwave!

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A Cheerio is at Cheerio high school, and there is another Cheerio that he wants to ask to the prom, but she is a frosted Cheerio and because of Cheerio social statuses she would not go with him. So he goes to the Cheerio factory so he can become a frosted Cheerio. The factory workers tell him that he can be a frosted Cheerio, but the machines are malfunctioning today and they can only frost half of him. He agrees, and the girl Cheerio goes to the prom with him. He shows up at the prom with her, and she asks him to get her some punch. So, he's walking around, looking for the punch line, when he realizes: There isn't any.

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Goodbye to the people who hated on me.

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How do you kill a vampire? Because vampires are figments of society's imagination and actuall living creatures, this task is impossible.

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A used condom filled with water and left on a radiator makes an ideal and inexpensive lava lamp.

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What's funnier than a fat person falling nothing is

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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