What looks like a horse, but smells and has feathers? A dead horse with a pidgeon in its ass.

Why did they name the team mavericks and why Was the maskot a horse? Because 50 years ago they found a blue horse And its name was maverick

Q: A man, already drunk, walked into a bar. What did he say? A: Ouch!

Why couldn't the dwarf mother reach for the top shelf? Her height was at a mini-mum.

What's worse than a rainy day? Rape.

Why did the genie not grant the man his 3 wishes? Genies don't exist, only vampires live in lamps.

whats worse than getting ran over by a car seeing you mum having ***

Whats the difference between a red cup and a blue cup. Ones red and the other is blue.

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

You know whats worse than finding a fly in your soup? 9/11

A guy walks into a bar. I didn't see anything else.

How many fish fingers does it take to change a lightbulb? Five.

what smells like red paint, but tastes blue? my heroine OD panflets

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

what has 52 teeth and holds back a monster? my zipper

Why did the polar bear die? Global warming.

a priest and a jewish guy walk into a bar. they both drink as expected and go home to their families

Which of the following is the biggest? A. 7 B. 17 C. 71 D. Yo mama

Q: Why didnt jim win the race ? A: Because he swalowed his tounge.

Why did Suzy fall of the swing? She didn't have arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Suzy.

Why did Suzie fall off the swings? Because she didn't have arms or legs. Knock, Knock. Who's there? Not Suzie

How do you make a girl scout cry? Kill her family.

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was a sociopathic murderer.

How many babies does it take to paint a house? It depends on how hard you throw them.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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