How many apes does it take to put in a light bulb 3

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What did the kid with turrets CHEESE! say to his mom.

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What do a grape and an elephant have in common? They're both purple, except for the elephant.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Where is the bathroom, I need to go poo.

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Chuck Norris farted and... several people looked around uncomfortably, not knowing how to react to the embarrassing situation.

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Why do people carry around spoons? Because they like to do them

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A student goes up to the teacher because he has to go to the washroom. The teacher tells him that he has to sing the ABC's before he can go. So the boy sings, "ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ." The teacher said he did a perfect job and could go to the washroom. The boy went on to become a billionaire. Congrats!

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A mother and her child run into the store... The mother opens the door, so the child does not run into the store again.

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What did the newborn get on it's birthday? A life

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Q: What do you call a gay dinosaur? A: Mega-saur-ass

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" After hearing this common expression, the horse looks up at the bartender. With this look, the bartender realizes that he has been speaking to I'll Have Another. Aware his faux pas, the bartender apologizes and pours him a free drink. The free drink does little for I'll Have Another's crushed dreams.

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Don't you hate when you finger your belly button and your nipples exploed?

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What did the boy and the dog do at the park? Nothing, the dogs dead

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theres no I in Intelligence a.w. j.p.

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Why don't women have breasts? Because they have dandruff. Get it? Hint: "dandruff" = "dan druff"

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Why did the man cut his hair? Cause he has cancer

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hat did the fridge say to the oven your hot baby \

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What's the difference between 31 dead hookers and a Lamborghini? One is a traumatizing tragedy that left at least 31 poor families mourning for their loved ones, whom were only trying to make a living in what is a terrible economy and were unable find a better job, and the other is an overpriced sports car.

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Safety in numbers? Try telling that too six million Jews.

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what did the history teacher say to his class? Get your books out.

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Knock knock Who's there Bill Bill who? Bill Thompson

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big fat hairy gigantic enourmous erectionn CC

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Something strange in you're neighborhood. Who you gonna call? The police.

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why did the man turn on and off the lights 20 times because he was diagnosed with O.C.D as a child

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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